Desire Resort Forums

Hello,
My wife and I will be coming for a few days as first timers in mid March and was just curious about the theme nights. Sounds like everyone kind of heads in late afternoon after the pool fun and gets ready for dinner? Do we go to dinner dressed as theme or is that more for after dinner? Wasn’t sure what to expect for dinner and didn’t want to show up dressed out of place. This is our first visit to a clothing optional resort and we are excited. Also, do women feel out of place if they are not topless. My wife is a little hesitant on that side of things for whatever reason so I don’t want her to feel forced to until she is ready. Thanks!!

jbarnes89 wrote:Hello,
My wife and I will be coming for a few days as first timers in mid March and was just curious about the theme nights. Sounds like everyone kind of heads in late afternoon after the pool fun and gets ready for dinner? Do we go to dinner dressed as theme or is that more for after dinner? Wasn’t sure what to expect for dinner and didn’t want to show up dressed out of place. This is our first visit to a clothing optional resort and we are excited. Also, do women feel out of place if they are not topless. My wife is a little hesitant on that side of things for whatever reason so I don’t want her to feel forced to until she is ready. Thanks!!

Hello!

There is no pressure to do anything at Desire. Many, if not most, women will be topless; many will be completely clothesless at the pool and beach areas. But again, there is no pressure. I (Mrs Cheers) was also hesitant on our first visit, but soon after (like 15 minutes LOL) I felt very comfortable shedding the clothes. It is surprisingly liberating and now, the husband and I always look forward to these trips.

As for the theme nights, in the past, I have dressed up for the themes and went down to dinner dressed as such. But I have seen others dress for dinner, then go back to their rooms to change for the theme nights. I might do it this way too on the next trip, just so I'm not having dinner while wearing lingerie or a neon frock.

- Mrs Cheers

Thank you Mrs. Cheers!
That is very good to know. We are really just dipping our toes right now and do not want to be too overwhelmed right off the bat. What should we expect after dinner with the nightly entertainment? Sounds like the disco is the place to be? Like I said, we are not looking to get overwhelmed so I guess I am just asking if most of the “play” stuff stays in the sun the sun room or up at the hot tub? We are not prudes by any means, but we will likely ease into that side of things haha. Thanks again! We are super excited

Yep, no pressure to go topless from anyone. We hung with a great couple last trip and the wife never took off her suit - top or bottom. Didn't make a bit of difference. As was stated, it's a pretty good bet that after a while (minutes, a few hours, or a day or so) she will come to ask herself "Look at all these other women of all shapes and sizes. They can do it so I certainly can."

But again, it doesn't matter if that doesn't happen.

If I had to guess, I'd say most people do not go to dinner in theme. Nothing wrong with doing so but some outfits certainly don't lend themselves to managing dinner. Plus, it's a chance for another outfit. Having said that, while maybe not "in theme", you can certainly be as sexy/daring as you like - no restriction there. There's plenty of time to go back and change into theme stuff for the disco.

You won't be exposed to anything hard-core in the disco for the most part. I think I've heard of a few stories where it went further but I've never seen anyone get freaky in the disco.

The general flow at RM is beach and/or pool until late afternoon, after which most head up to the hottub. A nice feature of the RM hottub is that not only is there a swimup bar in the hottub but a "dry" side as well with typical bar stools. So if your not ready to get into the hottub right away (and during pre-Covid times it was often packed) you can have a few drinks at the bar and just take in the scene. People then go to their rooms, followed by dinner. After that most congregate at the outside lobby bar where there is usually either a band playing (9:00PM - 10:30) or some other type entertainment. Then most of the crowd heads up to the nightclub, followed by the playroom or lobby bar or hottub or room. So there is plenty to do and you should just go at your own pace and comfort level.

Totally agree here! My husband always teases me about our first trip. I was so nervous about being naked/topless that I packed multiple "regular" bikini bottoms, string thong bikini bottoms, and tops to match all of them! The first day there I thought I would be brave and wear the thong bottoms and a top. The top probably lasted 30 minutes. I did keep the bottoms on as I have really fair skin and was worried about burns. No one cared or even noticed. When we went up to the hot tub in the afternoon I pulled the bottoms off to get in and didn't even think about it. Never used any of the "regular" bottoms.

As TandD said, we also hung out with people who's tops didn't come off. There is zero pressure at Desire which is what makes it so great!

I was SOOOOO nervous before our first trip, tell her not to stress. : ) She won't feel "out of place" anywhere.

Melody

Awesome. Thanks everyone as that was a HUGE help! I think she will be far more adventurous than she is leading on for most things that make the resort look like so much fun and that makes me feel better about that part not even typically being a big deal after the first thirty minutes (a couple of pina colossus will help that along too haha). Last question, how do the guys usually dress up for the theme nights? Do they go all out like the ladies? I am just not really the costume type but would still like to participate. Are dress shoes and a button up pretty well accepted too. Just don’t want to be a party pooper haha

jbarnes89 wrote:Thank you Mrs. Cheers!
That is very good to know. We are really just dipping our toes right now and do not want to be too overwhelmed right off the bat. What should we expect after dinner with the nightly entertainment? Sounds like the disco is the place to be? Like I said, we are not looking to get overwhelmed so I guess I am just asking if most of the “play” stuff stays in the sun the sun room or up at the hot tub? We are not prudes by any means, but we will likely ease into that side of things haha. Thanks again! We are super excited

After dinner, there is usually either a live band or a DJ playing music either at the outside area (not sure what it's called; it's right outside the main lobby) or there's something going on at the disco (up the spiral staircase) Desire is not a huge resort so you will see where the majority of guest congregate. Just go with the flow!

As for your other question, men can certainly dress up in theme clothing. Once during a leather theme night, there was a guy there fully decked in leather collars, a leash, some vest/chaps get up...it was very interesting. It's totally fine to be as dressed up as you want. And if you just want to wear normal clothes, that's fine too! Just don't wear anything boring like a turtleneck or sweatpants

You will find that the guys are all over the place. Some guys go all out with costumes, other guys wear a Hawaiian shirt and nice shorts or pants.

It looks like we are there around the same time, hopefully we meet up and have a drink!

Melody (& Beau)

Awesome. This all is a huge help!! Thanks so much
Yes it looks like we will be there at least one night at the same on the 16th (not sure how late or early you get in) and we are extremely excited about the lingerie theme night. Sounds like there won’t be too many people there so we will keep and eye/ear open that day and hopefully we can make it work with a drink (or 5) that day haha
Jason & Sarah