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Desire: right for us?

PostPosted: Sat Nov 06, 2021 4:01 pm
by cenote pete
Hey, all. Wondering if a trip to Desire is right for me and my wife. My wife is early 40s, smoking hot even after kids (as in, when she forgets her ring at the gym, she gets hit on my trainers and pro athletes five to ten years younger), but is also extraordinarily self-critical about her body (which, again, is objectively incredible). I affirm her regularly, and it's easy to do, but she's never quite "gotten" it, and I very much want her to.

She also loves the beach.

We're definitely monogamous and are committed to it. That said, I think a visit to Desire might 1) be a fun midlife crisis to experience together 2) be a positive experience for her as far as her self-confidence 3) be a nice week of vacation on a great beach.

I have no real context for a place like Desire, so your thoughts appreciated. Thanks!

Re: Desire: right for us?

PostPosted: Sat Nov 06, 2021 4:10 pm
by Vanilla Xtracts
Many guests visit with the intent to have a romantic holiday and remain monogamous & they do experience exactly that.
They also make new friends as the resorts are boutique sized and nearly everyone socializes to have a great time.

Go and enjoy and do as you please. There are no assumptions or expectations for anything more and if you find folks interested in you it’s a great plus to have the compliment and feel sexy for each other. Have sex outside under the stars at the hot tub and enjoy the guests who are open to discuss most topics.

Re: Desire: right for us?

PostPosted: Sat Nov 06, 2021 4:15 pm
by mikeinnj
You’ll have a great time. Just follow her lead once there. And no worry about monogamous as no means no.

Mike

Re: Desire: right for us?

PostPosted: Sun Nov 07, 2021 3:03 am
by nuru
She might be disappointed on part 3. I love Desire and spend all day on the beach. But it’s definitely not a ‘great beach’.

Just a thought that if you go and the beach part is important to her I think she would be very underwhelmed with it.

Re: Desire: right for us?

PostPosted: Sun Nov 07, 2021 6:47 am
by cenote pete
nuru wrote:She might be disappointed on part 3. I love Desire and spend all day on the beach. But it’s definitely not a ‘great beach’.

Just a thought that if you go and the beach part is important to her I think she would be very underwhelmed with it.


Thanks for the honesty. Does anyone take day trips - to Tulum, cenotes, ruins, beaches? Do most people who visit Desire primarily stay at Desire for the duration?

Re: Desire: right for us?

PostPosted: Sun Nov 07, 2021 8:26 am
by mikeinnj
For what you pay for a day at Desire, I’d stay elsewhere for the day trips. People do take them but it seems like a waste to me.

Stay a couple days before or after and do the trips from there

Mike

Re: Desire: right for us?

PostPosted: Sun Nov 07, 2021 10:14 am
by LuckySevens
mikeinnj wrote:For what you pay for a day at Desire, I’d stay elsewhere for the day trips. People do take them but it seems like a waste to me.

Stay a couple days before or after and do the trips from there

Mike


This. 100% this.

Re: Desire: right for us?

PostPosted: Sun Nov 07, 2021 3:16 pm
by cenote pete
Good to know. What if we spent a couple nights at, say, Intima in Tulum, did all the day trip things and got acclimated to the whole topless/nude scene, then popped over to Desire? Seems reasonable, right?

Basic question for sure, but we’d be looking at $600-$700 a night at Desire? Does that sound remotely accurate?

Re: Desire: right for us?

PostPosted: Sun Nov 07, 2021 4:47 pm
by mikeinnj
We book usually through Orbitz with air and hotel combined as it works out much cheaper for us. Also the cost per night depends on time of year you go and if you can catch any deals.

And you plan seems reasonable.

Also I’d choose chichen Itza or Coba over tulum as they are much more impressive imho.

Mike

Re: Desire: right for us?

PostPosted: Mon Nov 08, 2021 9:56 am
by gntatdesire
In seven trips to Desire (6 at RM, 1 at Pearl), we have never left the resort....too damn much fun, or recovering from too much fun :L
And on our first trip, it did take an entire 2 hrs, :D to shed our textiles, but we were under no pressure from fellow Desire attendees to do so.

The atmosphere allows a couple to just absorb, enjoy, reconnect, etc, while also finding naked (or near naked) people are MUCH more engaging, friendly, nonjudgmental, and simply fun.

And Desire is the place for such incredible sexy attire, both at dining, the lobby shows, and the disco. A rule from many years ago: if her dress won't fit in the palm of the hubby's hand, find one that will...it will be perfect.

Re: Desire: right for us?

PostPosted: Mon Nov 08, 2021 10:44 am
by Helles
We were in a similar spot just over a year ago. Our relationship is solid, monogamous, and the sex is amazing. We’re both gym rats so physically we’re similar to you. I suggested Desire as something different - especially since most of the world was shut down to tourism.
At first I got some pushback based on insecurities - you just want to look at naked women, why do you want to go to a sex resort?, is our sex life that lacking? Etc. But she trusted me and we went and had an absolute blast.

We’ve met some of the greatest folks that we still keep in touch with. It allows us to let our freak flag fly so to speak with theme nights. Really pushing boundaries and allowing her to feel sexy and desired.

A couple things a visit to Desire will do:
- Bring you closer as a couple - we checkin with each other everyday - making sure nothing is bothering us about the day before. And to go over highlights too.
- Allow you to explore (and sometimes break) your own sexual boundaries in a safe, respectful environment.
- Just allows you to be yourself in a judgment free environment.
- Talk to anyone and everyone. Being naked really break down that barrier.
- Relax or party - it’s your choice.

Desire will not fix an already broken relationship - that is a recipe for disaster.

We’re heading back for our fourth visit in January and can’t wait. Just go!

Re: Desire: right for us?

PostPosted: Tue Nov 09, 2021 2:45 am
by cenote pete
gntatdesire wrote:And Desire is the place for such incredible sexy attire, both at dining, the lobby shows, and the disco. A rule from many years ago: if her dress won't fit in the palm of the hubby's hand, find one that will...it will be perfect.


You're really making some very good and compelling points here.

Re: Desire: right for us?

PostPosted: Tue Nov 09, 2021 2:50 am
by cenote pete
Helles wrote:We were in a similar spot just over a year ago. Our relationship is solid, monogamous, and the sex is amazing. We’re both gym rats so physically we’re similar to you. I suggested Desire as something different - especially since most of the world was shut down to tourism.
At first I got some pushback based on insecurities - you just want to look at naked women, why do you want to go to a sex resort?, is our sex life that lacking? Etc. But she trusted me and we went and had an absolute blast.

We’ve met some of the greatest folks that we still keep in touch with. It allows us to let our freak flag fly so to speak with theme nights. Really pushing boundaries and allowing her to feel sexy and desired.

A couple things a visit to Desire will do:
- Bring you closer as a couple - we checkin with each other everyday - making sure nothing is bothering us about the day before. And to go over highlights too.
- Allow you to explore (and sometimes break) your own sexual boundaries in a safe, respectful environment.
- Just allows you to be yourself in a judgment free environment.
- Talk to anyone and everyone. Being naked really break down that barrier.
- Relax or party - it’s your choice.

Desire will not fix an already broken relationship - that is a recipe for disaster.

We’re heading back for our fourth visit in January and can’t wait. Just go!


Sounds very similar, definitely. Making her feel sexy and desired is the goal.

Are there ever couples who show up and bail? Dramatic blow-ups, big jealous fights, etc.?

Also, how's the food?

Re: Desire: right for us?

PostPosted: Tue Nov 09, 2021 9:11 am
by Helles
What worked for me was to make her feel like the only woman in the room. Especially when she goes beyond her comfort zone, make sure she knows her efforts are appreciated. My wife says I’m constantly smiling when we’re at desire - it’s because when she feels confident and sexy, it really shows.
But let her go at her own pace - she’ll find her happy place.

As for food, it’s actually pretty good. We’re foodies, and while it won’t blow your mind - there’s more than enough variety to keep things interesting

Re: Desire: right for us?

PostPosted: Tue Nov 09, 2021 10:34 am
by Helles
As for blow ups - we've seen a couple. Most of the time it's either a relationship that's already in trouble and they think this will fix it. Or a husband that made his wife come and the insecurities are amplified by the environment and alcohol. Or someone who just plain drinks way too much. The environment is fairly self policing in terms of people who are out of control or just being creepy. They are typically told to get lost or go back to their room and take a nap by other guests.

Desire does have security that are always around, but I've never seen a bad enough blow up to them get involved unless it's to keep people from just rolling in off the beach.