Desire Resort Forums

Hello all! My wife and I are looking at visiting RM early August. I've been digging into this site which has been super helpful! Thank you to all that have contributed. It's cool to be able to get some bearings. We've had some lifestyle experiences and then recently during a work trip to Mexico we booked a 1 night stay at Temptations to test the waters. We had been to a couple clubs in DFW but never a resort like this. We had a fantastic time. Although being in our 40s I don't think we'd be satisfied with the full on party atmosphere for multiple days.. hence looking at RM

My question is how beneficial do you think it is to connect with people that will be at the resort with you prior to arriving? We're not shy people and we didn't have any problems making some connections in the pool at Temptations. Still considering us newbies I wonder if it would add a comfort level being able to connect prior or not?

Anyone have any positive or negative experiences to this end? TIA!

We found it can be good… and bad. Good from the sense that there is a recognizable face at the pool and it makes it easy to kinda blend in when you get there and get down to the fun. It can also be good if you’re able to get some of the “first date” type stuff out of the way ahead of time. Makes for a connection to flow easy. But, the caution. It can also lead to expectations and put pressure on a situation if one couple feels more is going to happen, but once you meet the others decide it isn’t for them. We’ve loved the people we’ve chatted with ahead of time and built some awesome
Friendships prior to trips, but we also have had one or two situations turn south with people who felt there was more to be had than just a friend at the pool.

We’ll also be there 8/3-8/9

We are of the idea that it is totally unnecessary.
We are very different behind a screen than in person; there is a risk that those people you met in advance will waste your time because, a day or two later, you will discover that there is no chemistry.
If you prefer, make some contacts, but no commitment. One of Desire's charms is the wow factor; there is no one day the same as another, there is no group of guests the same as another.

We think part of the fun of each trip is not knowing who we will meet when we get there. The people are so respectful and everyone is a lot of fun. You do not have to be in the lifestyle to have a great time. If you have curiosities or fantasies you are looking to explore have fun with it. Bring costumes for the theme nights, they are a lot of fun and another icebreaker moment. Have the talk before you go, do not drink too much at the airport or on the plane, and introduce yourselves to your lounge chair or beach bed neighbors when you get there. You will have a blast! Elizabeth and Tom

Not something we do for many reasons -

Online personality is completely different than in person
Online pictures are completely different than in person
They are clingers - we don't need you attached to us every moment
We're not into the whole online chatting thing and often don't reply quickly enough and that grates on people
We aren't part of a group, don't want to feel like we are in a group, we are free agents and enjoy roaming

We are more of an in person couple and like to see the chemistry in person rather than what is said on chat.

The good thing is that we have definitely found a few people we know we will want to avoid just by how they act online haha

RicknMandy wrote:... It can also lead to expectations and put pressure on a situation if one couple feels more is going to happen, but once you meet the others decide it isn’t for them.

^^ This, 100%

gaviao wrote:there is a risk that those people you met in advance will waste your time because, a day or two later, you will discover that there is no chemistry.

^^ and this, 100%

SerendipityCouple wrote:We think part of the fun of each trip is not knowing who we will meet when we get there.

^^ SOOOOO this (also, hi new friends! It was great to meet you last week!)

BashfulDesires wrote:Online personality is completely different than in person
Online pictures are completely different than in person
They are clingers - we don't need you attached to us every moment

...and the perfect summary of all the above.

I think, given the consensus seen here, you've got a solid answer.

For us, it’s better to just go and meet people spontaneously while we are there.

SerendipityCouple wrote:We think part of the fun of each trip is not knowing who we will meet when we get there.

^^ SOOOOO this (also, hi new friends! It was great to meet you last week!)

Yes, we loved meeting you guys too. We had a blast! And it is meeting new friends like them that makes Desire our favorite adult vacation.

Agreed

BashfulDesires wrote:Not something we do for many reasons -

Online personality is completely different than in person
Online pictures are completely different than in person
They are clingers - we don't need you attached to us every moment
We're not into the whole online chatting thing and often don't reply quickly enough and that grates on people
We aren't part of a group, don't want to feel like we are in a group, we are free agents and enjoy roaming

To add a positive experience: on trip #5, we joined a recurring group that goes to RM. Some great chat time prior to the trip, and with one couple, upon our arrival we set a personal record , a great foursome on a hot tub bed that afternoon!