Desire Resort Forums

So we're planning our first trip to Desire RM next year and we are trying to determine if going during a takeover week is a good idea or not for our first experience. We've received some amazing feedback about the plus sides of attending a takeover (thanks mfay) and we are leaning in that direction - most likely during the Hot Tamales/Ynots week in May 2014.

We'd love to hear from people who have experienced both sides to get your thoughts. We're a mid 30's couple and we're not in the lifestyle but we respect those who are and we love to have a great time. The fairer half of our duo (K) would like to play with another woman though which is cool as long as I (J) get to watch!

Thanks in advance for any feedback. We can't wait to get there!

J&K

There are two excellent trip reports already posted on the forum that should help, both are from the same forum member.

This was their first experience at a clothing optional resort
first timers - trip report december 13-17 2012

and the second is on a subsequent visit going with a takeover group for their first time
"Group"On - tripping with a group - a first time experience

We've only done the non-group week and can highly recommend it. I'd say it was half lifestyle and half nudists, which half of which were probably interested in some sort of light play. My wife and I are LS but we can take it or leave it. We only play when it feels right and don't actively look for it. We ended up spending a lot of time with both types of people. No one ever pushes anything and if they're interested in playing with you, they'll ask. Even on a non-takeover week though there is more than plenty of opportunities to do whatever you want with others, should you decide to.

We talked a bit with another couple that left soon after we arrive who had been there for a month. From what they were saying, the weeks that were LS takeovers, they didn't enjoy that much (and they were LS). As others have mentioned, the groups can be pretty inclusive. They know a lot of each other already and aren't as easy to engage. Also be careful which group is going. Apparently, one of those takeovers was 75% Spanish speaking, which if you only speak English, then that can be a huge communication issue.

Either way, you should have a great time. I don't think you can really go wrong, unless you have the language issue I mentioned.

During our trips to Desire RM (6x) and Desire Pearl, we went as part of a group. We are going to Desire RM the week of Oct.19 which is the first time we will be there during a non-takeover or non "group" week. We are looking forward to it. One of the issues with groups, particularly those that have booked Desire for years, such as Lifestyle Lounge, is that most of the people have been multiple times and know each other. That doesn't mean folks aren't friendly, but when people have made friends on a previous trip and only see them once a year at a resort, they naturally want to hang together, go to dinner together, etc. We've done the same thing when we travelled to Jamaica same week every year and made alot of friends.

Contrary to the expectations that some newbies might have, it doesn't necessarily follow that things are wilder and there is more open sex when a lifestyle group is there. I'm sure that is the case some weeks, but not all. In fact during our two trips with LL we couldn't believe the hottub scene - busy, everyone having a good time but very few pds's. Extremely tame, in contrast to one of our trips to Hedo 3 with LL which was pretty wild. We've had a good time on all our vacations to Desire, and are looking forward to this trip which will be somewhat of a new experience. Every trip has been different.

It probably depends in large part upon the group doing the takeover.

We've been to Desire 8 times, and only once with a group. To be honest, ours was a disappointing experience (and we were not newbies at the time of our visit). This was a group that had been going to Desire for a number of years and many people in the takeover knew each other. Nothing was done by the organizers to welcome us, introduce us to other members, or to make us feel part of group. (This was not a complete takeover--there were others at the resort who were not part of the group.) We still had a typically great time because we met others on our own and had our own fun, but we were disappointed. We can only imagine what first-time guests to Desire who were part of the group were thinking. At least it wasn't our first rodeo.

We've been at the resort as non-takeover guests during group weeks, and haven't seen much of a difference in "how wild" it is. To be honest, some groups just aren't that wild. With some, you might increase your odds of meeting a lifestyle couple, but again that depends upon the group.

We suggest that you ask a lot of questions of the organizers up front. Is it a lifestyle group? Do all of the guests already know each other? Is it a group that is geographically based (from a certain state or city)? What do the organizers do to welcome newbies to the group? Are there any group-only events during the week? Or is it just a chance for the same group of people to get together and go to Desire annually?

On one of our trips we overlapped with a European Group and they seemed to be full on, hard core swingers. Not that that is a problem, this is just FYI. They had organized tours and on-site events - some we could participate in and some we couldn't. And the outfits they dressed up in at night were amazing! Full on boots, leather, whips, etc.

In the evening and into the night they had taken over all the beds ALL OVER the resort and the playroom. Again, not that this was a problem, just FYI.

We were staying in a room right next door to one of the couples and we were 'sharing' the balcony the next morning with them, it was their last day and they starting to pack up but they were trying to hook up with anyone and everyone before they left. They actually kinda creeped us out.

We have fun at Desire whether or not there is a Group or Takeover and never have any issues meeting people whether or not we join a Yahoo Group.

What is the best way when booking to find out if it is a takeover week/period or not?

We just always travel with friends we've met previously at Desire.
Kind of our own "takeover".

Gnash wrote:What is the best way when booking to find out if it is a takeover week/period or not?

Here's a direct link to the official calendar on here: http://my.calendars.net/desiremasterc

It never loads for me within the forum, so I always have to go to it directly, but there is a top level forum here called "master groups calendar" that you can use to figure it out in the future.

we went on August 10 for a week, only 35% full. we had the best time and made more friends the any other resorts we have been to that were full.

NCVETTE wrote:we went on August 10 for a week, only 35% full. we had the best time and made more friends the any other resorts we have been to that were full.

We agree - not necessarily that it was 35% full but going on your 'own' and there not being a group or take-over can make it easier to meet people - not so 'clicky' and 'groupy'. But we're going next year when a group is there (first time experience for us) and we're looking forward to that trip and meeting the Group!

This is such a good question and there is already much good feedback here for you to consider.

We host the Lifestyle Lounge March takeover, and though we try very, very hard to help first time attendees to feel included, sometimes it can be difficult. As someone pointed out, we have people that have been attending for the last 9 years and have grown very close with other friends they met there. It can be especially difficult if:

1. You come to the takeover part way through. I think it's harder to engage when people have already been there 3 or 4 days and you're just arriving. Plus, if we don't happen to see you at the Hospitality center on the first day, you might slip between the cracks. If we know you're new, we'll do our best to introduce you to as many people as we can.

2. You are very shy. As noted above, many folks know each other and have established friendships. If you're naturally gregarious, you'll make friends easier.

With that said, we try to create a few special events to help first time attendees. Early on in the week, we hold a really special wine tasting event. People come with a bottle or two of their favorite wine and the resort does the rest. A little vino in the late afternoon can go a long way with starting new friendships!

I can't speak to other takeovers, but our's is comprised of every level of swinging (and non-swinging) that's out there. We have full swap, soft swap, no- swap, girl- girl, exhibitionists, voyeurs and more. Some folks like to attend just so the Mrs. can dress sexy, and that's it.

Really, the best thing that can be said is, you will seek your own fun at Desire. It is a resort unlike any other. Have a wonderful time, no matter what you decide to do!

Kathleen