First time

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First time

Postby para4ms » Wed Aug 23, 2017 2:02 am

That's a first time for us to be in a nude resort. Wife is a little unsure now. She is OK with people being naked, including me :D; however, she doesn't know, if she'll do it. Same thing with the fun play :D , LS activity etc. Any advice, We are in our early 40's. Thanks.
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Re: First time

Postby TandD » Wed Aug 23, 2017 7:29 am

Specifically, what is she worried about? What has changed since deciding to go, and now? I understand getting the jitters as you get closer to the date but the reasons you decided to go in the first place probably haven't changed.

Just recognize this a normal jitters. Sometimes you just have to hold your breath and follow through with your bold decisions. You've done the research - you *know* you will have a great time. Just jump in and you will be fine.

...Unless you are murdered at the airport or die after drinking tainted alcohol at the hot tub bar.

Should be fine though...
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Re: First time

Postby para4ms » Wed Aug 23, 2017 11:36 am

Thanks for your respond. I truly appreciate it.
I think you are wright, it’s jitters. She worries about taking cloth off publicly first time. She is the one that is afraid of any “first step” (we are married for many years). I think we would appreciate any support, especially from couples who are going to be there and may be we can meet.
:D/
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Re: First time

Postby CokeMann » Wed Aug 23, 2017 1:12 pm

Desire is not a nude resort - it's a clothing optional resort.

She can be as clothed or non clothed as she wishes - it's her call as to if, when and how much ;)
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Re: First time

Postby para4ms » Wed Aug 23, 2017 1:34 pm

I hope we would be able to meet good people there to have some fun, and we would not feel strangers.
Thank you guys.
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Re: First time

Postby bmerryman » Wed Aug 23, 2017 3:24 pm

You will meet some of the friendliest, non-judgmental, open folks you will find anywhere. Just go and be open to talking with others, and soon they won't be strangers to you.
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Re: First time

Postby Twohere4some » Wed Aug 23, 2017 3:48 pm

On our first trip to DRM 4 years ago, my wife felt much the same way. At the time we were both early 50's. We had been to a resort in Jamaica that did have a nude beach area separate from the main resort that we went to a couple of days but she was still self-conscious as far as Desire was concerned. On our second day we had an erotic massage scheduled for late morning. We had gone to the pool after breakfast for awhile prior. She had taken her suit off at the pool to get some sun and when time came to head to the spa, she just grabbed the bag she had her things in and walked naked all the way.

As for the Lifestyle, we had very limited experience prior to Desire. We had met a very nice couple at the hot tub our first afternoon and my wife and the wife of the couple had talked quite a bit. For our massage the next day we had requested two female masseuses. My wife's was a lovely younger woman who was very good. Know for a fact that she came at least twice for her before they put us together. As we were walking back to our room, my wife commented very matter-of-factly the she thought the wife of the couple wanted her and she felt the same. That fact was confirmed later that evening in the Sin Room. We have had many other wonderful adventures at Desire and other places since that time.

Can't say your experience will be the same but wish you the best!
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Re: First time

Postby para4ms » Thu Aug 24, 2017 12:47 am

Thank you gut for your honesty. There is a hope for us too.
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Re: First time

Postby desireaddict » Thu Aug 24, 2017 10:41 am

para4ms wrote:Thank you gut for your honesty. There is a hope for us too.

You and your wife are at the same place we all were with our initial visit to Desire.
Most everyone here has returned again and again and again.
Be prepared to have to consider what things in life you can live without so as to be able to budget in future trips to Desire.

We'll be watching for your trip report!

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Re: First time

Postby Pwrboaters » Mon Aug 28, 2017 5:56 pm

Our first trip was October of 2016. We were also apprehensive about what to expect since we had NEVER been to a C/O or lifestyle resort but quickly learned that no one cares what your comfort level is. Everyone is accepted. As far as the nudity goes, by the first afternoon in the hot tub we told each other "i will if you will" and we did. It was fun but no one treated us any different than when we were clothed. As far as the lifestyle stuff, we're still figuring our way through that but i will say, we've surprised ourselves as to how much we've embraced it. Communication is the key on that. Then there's the resort. When you take away the nudie stuff and the sexy stuff.... its still one of the best resorts we have been to. The service is excellent, the food is good and the small atmosphere really makes it for us. Then throw in the best people you'll ever meet. That did it for us. We are booked again for December. It will be the 4th trip in 14 months :D I have a feeling you will have the same experience.
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Re: First time

Postby Wilmcouple » Tue Aug 29, 2017 3:58 pm

So, our first time to anything like DRM was last June. There is no question we are definitely going back! My advice to you would be to read all the forums you can and reach out specifically to the couples that will be going during your timeframe. We connected with couples months in advance and became friends and/or acquaintances before we even got there. It definitely made the transition from being completely clothed to completely naked much easier. We arrived early (before our room was ready) got changed in the spa and headed straight to the pool from some "liquid encouragement", First 5 minutes we were there we saw couples we had been chatting with and everything was smooth sailing from there. Even if you don't connect with anyone before hand, the people you'll meet are absolutely wonderful and will make you feel extremely comfortable. We cant wait to go back.
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Re: First time

Postby para4ms » Tue Aug 29, 2017 4:43 pm

Where are the LS plays usually going and how does it start? For example, do people meet in the hot tub or bar or ... and than they go somewhere to privacy?
PS: If it's inappropriate question, just ignore it. Thanks
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Re: First time

Postby nokidclub » Tue Aug 29, 2017 7:58 pm

para4ms wrote:Where are the LS plays usually going and how does it start? For example, do people meet in the hot tub or bar or ... and than they go somewhere to privacy?
PS: If it's inappropriate question, just ignore it. Thanks


Not inappropriate at all! Our first visit is this weekend, and I was wondering the same thing.

I assume as it gets to be later in the night, more opportunities arise, especially in the hot tub and the playroom. Although, I hear that the playroom is sometimes quiet. We will work to change that during our visit!
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Re: First time

Postby Explorer79 » Wed Aug 30, 2017 7:18 pm

nokidclub wrote:I assume as it gets to be later in the night, more opportunities arise, especially in the hot tub and the playroom. Although, I hear that the playroom is sometimes quiet. We will work to change that during our visit!


I think the opportunities are there whenever you are interacting with people, whatever the time happens to be. Many times what happens at night has been cultivated from earlier in the day. In fact if you wait until the night to begin to seize your opportunities the ship may have already sailed, you'll notice couples have already paired off.

I'm not saying that things can't happen spontaneously at night, they certainly do, but I've seen many times where that would've been too late. Most likely, whatever you do you're going to have to be at least somewhat proactive, it's probably not going to work out very often such that you sit back and wait then it just lands in your lap.

The playroom is sometimes quiet, sometimes its wild. Same thing can be said for the jacuzzi. It's very crowd dependent. We've seen it mind blowingly off the charts one night then the next night at the same time there are 3 couples in there - it just depends.
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Re: First time

Postby Justskin » Thu Aug 31, 2017 2:12 am

Explorer's insights are spot on....
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