Desire Resort Forums

Planning the trip to celebrate our 20th anniversary. Would love to get feedback on what a typical day for a newbie couple looks like when we are not sure what we want to do. My wife is supernervous, I had to work to convince her for a few weeks for her to even agree to go. She and I are both nervous and excited at the same time. Would love feedback and advice.

I'd suggest that you both read through the numerous posted trip reports from newbies/first timers which will give you a great overview then post any specific questions you may have

Tell her to just chill out and relax. (That seems so simple, doesn't it?)
She doesn't have to get nekkid. She doesn't have to have sex with others. She doesn't have to have sex with you in public. But it WILL result in you guys having lots of sex together (at least in private)!

Of course, all of the reinforcement you might get here is NOT going to calm the jitters.
Been there. Done that. Still have the T-Shirt.

We are conservative, Buckle of the Bible Belt conservatives with way over a dozen trips to Desire.
We don't participate (much) in all the "reindeer games" at Desire, but we love the atmosphere and what it has added to our relationship.
Just do it!
(But please go to Pearl. DRM is having too many sold out days resulting in problems with our last minute bookings.)

Life is Good!
DA

Thank you cokemann and desireaddict!!

Agree with both CokeMann and Desireaddict.

We all were newbies once and here we are. In my case, for our very first trip, my wife did not want to go. She was not OK with seeing others naked having sex in public places and not even in her wildest dreams she was planning to have sex with me in front of others . Finally she accepted to go and she said "it would be the first and last trip to that hotel"... We have been there 5 or 6 times and will be there next week.

What did I do? Exactly what CokeMann suggested: Spent hours reading and reading not only trip reports but everything else, so I could learn how Desire works, how the people interact, what to expect, and knowing how my wife is, I kept telling her about everything, so she would also know what to expect and how to interact to avoid anything that would make her feel bad.

Now she looks forward to our annual 3-night trip to Desire because she knows how to enjoy it.

Good luck!!!

Wait when did they change to newbie first day protocol. When wifey and I were there for the first time they called every guest to the lobby when we arrived... ripped our clothes off and the proceeded to have anal sex with us for 5 hours nonstop.... are they not doing that anymore????

In all seriousness.... just do whatever u would do at a normal resort. Swim, sun tan, drink, eat, dance, talk to people. U can keep ur clothes on. So really nor much different than any other resort with regards to what you want to do.

Thanks Yeipi and goldfish1

Just have fun and don't over think it. If you or your honey, want to wear swimsuits do so. Be comfortable, be yourself and meet some wonderful people. We have made lifelong friends at Desire. We do business with a couple we met there and work, for a couple of months a summer, for another couple we met there. People are respectful. You may get hit on but if that isn't your thing a simple, "thanks but no thanks" works wonders. We take it as a compliment.

The first time in the hot tub is "interesting."

Enjoy, it's a lot of fun.

Thanks David and Julie

Yes, as said by others, read newbie reports and others. My wife knew very little about it and was a little shocked upon arrival. We were there for four nights. By the end, my wife was fairly comfortable. As you have read, everyone is completely welcoming and respectful. People will try to figure you out perhaps or at least some may as if you are in the lifestyle but it is totally cool. Whether you are or are not, it is nothing to fear. The best thing for my wife, and I wish she had done it earlier in the trip, was beach volleyball. She loves games. Volleyball is not my thing. That was something for her in which she could participate, have fun, and meet some people in a way that she was comfortable. It was a great "icebreaker" of sorts. So my advice is to try to find something that would put her at ease. Something that is fun for her, relaxing, or can give her confidence.

Also, if you wife is worried about the pressure of being nude or even topless, while there is no need to be worried because no one does or should care what she or you do, I bought my wife some small, sheer bikinis. While she eventually went all nude at times, the sheer bikinis, even if just bottoms, got a lot of compliments. It was a good in between a simple sexy bikini and out right nudity. Plus I think it was sexy and fun but still at least 90% revealing.

We had our first trip in July of 2016, we both stayed completely covered at the pool until the alcohol kicked in. Never looked back from their, being nude was just normal. Never thought in a million years that I’d feel comfortable being nude in front of a bunch of strangers, but that atmosphere changes people. We will be going back in July of this year for our second trip and can hardly wait.

Definitely read as much as you can on the forum. There's so much information and most questions have already been asked, or at least similar questions have been asked. We will have been on the forum for just about two years by the time we visit Desire for the first time this summer. There's always more that we're learning.

We are still a little nervous of course, but we're also much more prepared than we otherwise would have been, and everyone on the forum has been extremely welcoming and friendly.

Best of luck.

Thanks everyone for the tips, advice and encouragement

I think that you will be amazed a just how easy it is and how there is actually less judgment and competition as compared to being at a vanilla resort. Our first time we went to the pool in our suits, felt out of place, stripped in front of everyone and never looked back