Report 8/19-8/23, 2022

[generixxx]

For context, this was our 3rd Desire experience. The first was Cabo (before closing), then DRM, and now DRM again. I’ll keep this brief but feel free to DM us for further details on anything.

Travel
We used Kalido this time from the airport, to our hotel transfer for the second leg of our trip, and back to the airport. Nothing but 5 stars for us. No traffic issues at any point but we did see the construction.

Arrival
We were greeted by Ivan who did a wonderful job welcoming us and checking us in. That was followed by the sell on the premier meeting which we declined a few times. After then walking us to the spa, another offer in even more spa credits was made, so we agreed, knowing we will never be premier members. We were early (12PM) and Ivan did a great job booking us at the spa for our erotic massage on our last day, applying the credits, and the spa then giving us a locker. From there, we grabbed lunch and then headed to the beach where we lounged naked until our room was ready.

Room
We were in a deluxe ocean view and have zero complaints about the room. Great temperature control, great view, great porn selection, and great turndown service. Bags we delivered to our room. Fridge was overstocked each day.

Food
We went in with low expectations and we’re shocked by how much better the food has gotten. Even the buffets were really well done. Very much improved from the past.

Staff
Each staff member was lovely. We’d like to especially call out Africa at the pool and Jorge at the buffet. We had Jorge at the buffet twice and he’s just one of the kindest humans we’ve ever met. He even saw us eating at Suki as he walked by and came into the restaurant where he wasn’t working to check on us and say goodbye. Really impressive service.

Entertainment
The nightly shows have also improved and was an enjoyable 2 hours each evening. The nightclub was largely unchanged and we didn’t use the playroom this time around. Jacuzzi also unchanged but VERY active each afternoon and late night.

People
While we keep reading a 50/50 split on lifestyle vs not, this has NOT been our experience either trip to DRM. We are not in the lifestyle but like being naked and playing publicly. However, we were the vast minority and felt “hunted” most of the trip. To the point where we were heavily pressured more than once. Nothing more annoying than listening to someone try to convince us to do something they want us to do. Really became a turnoff and we eventually just avoided everyone. This is the reason that we won’t be returning and will be looking for alternatives that better suit us. If you are in the lifestyle, this IS where you want to be.

Erotic Massage
Amazing experience for us but much more than what we’ve experienced the other 2 times we’ve done it.

All in all, the resort has worked hard to be its best version of itself but the people we’ve encountered are far too pushy for us to ever return. We don’t judge and if we were in the lifestyle, it would be wonderful place. It’s just not for us.

[Workhardplayhard]

We also find RM to be annoyingly high pressure. Every other year we think, "let's try it again, maybe people are more chill." After 2 days into every trip, we both say, "nope... still the same."

And back to Pearl we go for the next 2 years... Try Pearl; we think you would like it better. It is what you make it.

[Turk7]

Interesting. We are not in the lifestyle and have been to DRM ten times and never have been pressured by people in the lifestyle. We go there for the sexually charged atmosphere and to sometimes go outside our comfort zone that doesn’t include swapping partners. As a matter of fact several times people have commented to us that it was obvious we are deeply in love. When we have had some conversations with others, usually in the hot tub, we have been asked if we are in the lifestyle we say no and that’s where it ends. Other times during conversation with others they just realize we are not in the lifestyle without asking and have never been questioned about why we weren’t in the lifestyle. On our last visit in July and met several couples who were also not in the lifestyle. I will say that we have observed once people find out we are not in the lifestyle they move on to be with people of the same mindset. It may just depend on the people that are there that particular week on how you are approached.

[generixxx]

Interesting. We are not in the lifestyle and have been to DRM ten times and never have been pressured by people in the lifestyle. We go there for the sexually charged atmosphere and to sometimes go outside our comfort zone that doesn’t include swapping partners. As a matter of fact several times people have commented to us that it was obvious we are deeply in love. When we have had some conversations with others, usually in the hot tub, we have been asked if we are in the lifestyle we say no and that’s where it ends. Other times during conversation with others they just realize we are not in the lifestyle without asking and have never been questioned about why we weren’t in the lifestyle. On our last visit in July and met several couples who were also not in the lifestyle. I will say that we have observed once people find out we are not in the lifestyle they move on to be with people of the same mindset. It may just depend on the people that are there that particular week on how you are approached.

That’s great to hear and how it should be. Sadly, we had a few people going as far as saying things like “you’ll never look at your husband’s dick the same way again.” But my beautiful wife was quick to respond with “you clearly haven’t taken a good look at my husband’s dick”

This is just one example of many “pressured” situations and we’re couple that always gets shit from our friends for being grossly in love. It’s very clear there and in our daily lives.

[eddieandjojo]

Generixxx, sorry you had to experience that sort of behavior, while it does happen it is usually not that aggressive and people we've come across take a simple no thank you and move on as noted above. Could be the week you guys were there, a full moon (haha, well sort of) and who know what else could have triggered the rude, aggressive behavior.....sad thing is you've decided not to go back to DRM. A previous post recommended giving Pearl a try, we think that's sage advice!

We did Cabo a few times, the first being a lifestyle takeover for opening week in 2006, holy crap was that an eye-opening experience. We were hit on several times but they respected our boundaries and we ended up having an awesome time! Anyway, good luck in your journey, hard to find a place like Desire where the atmosphere is electric!

[generixxx]

Generixxx, sorry you had to experience that sort of behavior, while it does happen it is usually not that aggressive and people we've come across take a simple no thank you and move on as noted above. Could be the week you guys were there, a full moon (haha, well sort of) and who know what else could have triggered the rude, aggressive behavior.....sad thing is you've decided not to go back to DRM. A previous post recommended giving Pearl a try, we think that's sage advice!

We did Cabo a few times, the first being a lifestyle takeover for opening week in 2006, holy crap was that an eye-opening experience. We were hit on several times but they respected our boundaries and we ended up having an awesome time! Anyway, good luck in your journey, hard to find a place like Desire where the atmosphere is electric!

Thanks so much for the kind wishes! We’ll find our way. We don’t regret the trip, we’ve just decided we’re not the best fit. As I said, SO many pros about the place!

[SusanAndDavid]

Very sorry to read this- we've slowly migrated to full on lifestyle activities but for 7 trips or so, we weren't and we didn't experience any issues like you did. As others have mentioned, perhaps just a bad couple of eggs and hopefully, Pearl will be more to your liking. We are DM snobs (7x) but we're headed to Pearl in Oct for our first try at it. Will certainly be glad to share our experience there in hopes you'll give it a try. Best of luck to you.

[Cheers2US]

Sorry you had that experience that left a bad taste in your mouth.

We are not swingers either, but like others, we like the safe, sexual atmosphere and the feeling of being uninhibited. We have been to Desire RM about 7 times and we've never felt pressured.

I think (and I hope) that you had some "bad apple" guests during your stay. With all the positives you posted, I hope you don't rule out Desire RM altogether. As others have mentioned, Desire Pearl is also wonderful. But again, it all depends on who else is there at the same time. The guests are the variable; everything else about the resort is a constant.

[Turk7]

Interesting. We are not in the lifestyle and have been to DRM ten times and never have been pressured by people in the lifestyle. We go there for the sexually charged atmosphere and to sometimes go outside our comfort zone that doesn’t include swapping partners. As a matter of fact several times people have commented to us that it was obvious we are deeply in love. When we have had some conversations with others, usually in the hot tub, we have been asked if we are in the lifestyle we say no and that’s where it ends. Other times during conversation with others they just realize we are not in the lifestyle without asking and have never been questioned about why we weren’t in the lifestyle. On our last visit in July and met several couples who were also not in the lifestyle. I will say that we have observed once people find out we are not in the lifestyle they move on to be with people of the same mindset. It may just depend on the people that are there that particular week on how you are approached.

That’s great to hear and how it should be. Sadly, we had a few people going as far as saying things like “you’ll never look at your husband’s dick the same way again.” But my beautiful wife was quick to respond with “you clearly haven’t taken a good look at my husband’s dick”

This is just one example of many “pressured” situations and we’re couple that always gets shit from our friends for being grossly in love. It’s very clear there and in our daily lives.

Great answer from your wife. Glad to see she was able to think quick on her feet for a response. Sounds very familiar we always get shit from our friends for being do’s affectionate. Especially when we go out to diner and one of kisses the other before going to the bathroom. To bad we weren’t there at the same time sounds like we would had a good time and maybe you would have had better memories.

[BandMfromtexas]

We were there 8/13 to 8-20. It was a great group the week we were there. We went in as curious vanillas and we got questioned a couple times but it was never in an aggressive way and people basically just talked to us. We are already planning our 2nd trip to return next year.

[SG370]

Really became a turnoff and we eventually just avoided everyone...will be looking for alternatives that better suit us.

All in all, the resort has worked hard to be its best version of itself but the people we’ve encountered are far too pushy for us to ever return. We don’t judge and if we were in the lifestyle, it would be wonderful place.

The sentiment of "we're not swingers, but we do enjoy other people's naked company" is one that I think has been expressed here many, many times. A couple of people have chimed in with it just in this thread!

I think the solution is pretty simple. Just like the "lifestyle" crowd has their groups and organizes their resort takeovers, maybe the monogamous folks who want to enjoy getting sexy together, without actually getting sexy together, should start their own group and coordinate their own trips to the place.

FWIW my wife and I have had an interest in visiting, but we put it off due to similar concerns. We find most forms of promiscuity to be a big turn-off and being aggressively propositioned like you described would be our worst nightmare

[rentman]

FWIW my wife and I have had an interest in visiting, but we put it off due to similar concerns. We find most forms of promiscuity to be a big turn-off and being aggressively propositioned like you described would be our worst nightmare


Might I suggest Hidden Beach, We have been there a few times and It is pretty nice. No sexual activity and pretty laid back (actually really laid back)

[SG370]

Might I suggest Hidden Beach, We have been there a few times and It is pretty nice. No sexual activity and pretty laid back (actually really laid back)

Yeah, we're already aware of Hidden Beach. That's just the thing though. All these nudist spots out there seem to frown on PDS. OP mentions looking for alternatives but there just aren't any from what we can see.

It'd be nice if there was a version of Desire that catered mainly to monogamists. Or like I said a group, which would more or less accomplish the same thing.

[Orcowboy]

I think you happened to go on a weird week. What you are describing is NOT the norm at either resort. Of course, in the many times that we have been to both in the last 4 years, there are weird weeks, once in a while. Sometimes a group of "friends" will all go the same week and then can either be pushy or clickish (June for us this year) but not the usual. We do exclusively go to Pearl now, though....

[nuru]

We are what we class as lifestyle lite. We do play, but rarely and usually only with friends we’ve known a while
First. Must say the OPs comments surprised me a little. We’ve done a lot of long trips to DRM this last couple years and rarely do we find the situation they state.