Newbie report October 2023

[Cacouple1014]

Disclaimer: This will be LONG. I loved and appreciated reading others’ detailed accounts so I will do the same.
Background:
We are a mid-30’s couple with no experience in the lifestyle. We have an excellent sex life where we definitely use fantasies of a third person, but have never done anything like this and are definitely not partyers, especially with a 2 year old at home. That being said, in an effort to find a sexy erotic podcast, I started listening to That Couple Next Door’s podcast. I know that sounds like we’re less vanilla than what we lead on, but it was really just me being a horn dog even though fantasies always swirled around in my head. Anyways, I had remembered them talking about going to Desire several times and I was sold. Had to find a way to bring it up to the wife so I figured our 10 year wedding anniversary/18 year total trip was a good a time as any. At first she said “what?!” and how crazy I was. But most importantly, it was never a no. As soon as she said she’d think about it, I knew she was intrigued. Over the next few months I’d poke and prod to gauge her reaction. During sex, I would try to bring up certain things like f**king in front of other people, basically watching live porn in front of us, how every guy would be staring at her amazing ass, and even getting an erotic massage where she can choose to have another man touch her for the first time. I guess we’re what I’m going to call “lifestyle light”. In the end, she agreed in exchange for a Louis Vuitton handbag. Money well spent obviously, but now I’m thinking I got fleeced in this deal since she got the handbag and the trip of a lifetime.
Day 1-
Arrived at Cancun airport on Sunday, dreading what everyone had described of the hallway walk. To be honest, it wasn’t as bad as what others have said. The instructions for USA transfers had left me a little confused on where to go since they were specific not to walk out the doors at the end of the hallway. Of course, you need to in order to get outside and out to the USA transfer person. Several workers from other companies kept trying to get my attention, but I didn’t pay attention to them. Eventually one was persistent and asked what company I booked with. I told him USA transfers and he pointed me to where I needed to go. Morale of the story, most of these transportation workers aren’t out to screw you. You don’t need to ignore them, just say no thanks and move on.
After the short drive to Puerto Morales, we pulled off the highway onto that 2 lane road and eventually through that swampy area where employees park. I had read enough reviews to know about it all, but it is a little concerning in the back of your head. I know my wife was giving me some sideways glances. We get to RM and are ushered into the lobby. At that point it’s all becoming real. We get sat down with Ivan who describes everything. Nothing surprised me since I had scoured every trip report on this forum. But it is difficult to listen and pay attention when people are walking past the lobby with minimal or no clothes on. During this check in process, Ivan asked if we would be interested in the membership presentation in exchange for a voucher for a couple’s massage that could be applied to partially pay for an erotic massage if we wanted. I was a little bummed out it would only partially cover an erotic massage, but I figured a $300+ voucher would definitely help pay for it. He called the spa and set up the erotic massage on Tuesday after our membership presentation. More on that later. Our room wasn’t available yet so he took us around the grounds and took us to the spa to change into our suits before leaving us be for the afternoon. I had my swim trunks and my wife wore a thong bikini bottom with a micro bikini top. Both pieces she would never wear normally. I should stop to say that my wife is drop dead sexy. With nice C cup tits, a big bubble butt, and amazingly thick thighs (thick thighs save lives), every single part of her body drives me crazy when we're at home, never mind a sexually charged environment like Desire. We took the advice of most forum contributors and eased in by having lunch first. It was definitely an eye opening scene. At first it’s a little jarring to see tits, ass, and dicks while everyone is walking around or lounging by the pool. We finished lunch, grabbed 2 open seats by the pool, but then decided to check out the beach cabana beds. Stayed there for a while, but by then it was 2pm and we knew the infamous Jacuzzi was open so we went up there to check it out. There was already a couple up there, the guy stroking his cock while his wife was recording and appeared to be ready to give him head. As exciting as it was, we weren’t there yet so we went back to the beach cabanas. This time we were feeling a little more relaxed with everything so we took off our clothes. After a while, hands began wandering and my wife’s pussy was so wet so I suggested we go back up to the Jacuzzi to get this vacation started before the evening crowd. At that point, it was just the guy laying on a chair sunbathing. We headed right for the cabana and fucked out in the open. Talk about exhilarating! Once we finished, we headed back to the lobby to get our room. We opted for the superior garden view room since we wouldn’t be in it too much. Laid low until dinner, stayed out for the nightly entertainment, but called it an early night due to a headache that would not go away. I guess a good amount of alcohol and minimal food/water intake is a bad idea. Who knew?
Day 2-
Woke up early to go reserve some chairs. Came back to grab my wife and head to the gym. We were feeling pretty good about ourselves for actually working out on vacation, but this was the only day we actually worked out. Whoops. After working out we went to breakfast. From there, we headed to the pool for the day. This time my wife opted to wear the matching micro bikini bottom to match her top. To say I was excited is an understatement. We almost didn’t make it out of the room. We laid down on the chairs for a bit before she removed her top to get the girls some sun. I teased her that she’s going to get a tan line from the bottoms (we had both been going to a tanning salon to get a little base tan with no tan lines prior to the trip. It didn’t take much prodding because she was taking off her bottoms before I knew it. We had agreed we would do it together so off went my bottoms. That is a freeing feeling. And the crazy thing is, no one even bats an eye. It’s so normalized there. You start to think, “I could get used to this”. In the afternoon, it started raining so we headed back to the room. Had dinner at the buffet, but because it was on/off raining, we went to our room in between dinner and the show. Because of the weather, they moved the show up to the club so we went to check it out. IT WAS PACKED and we walked out the door as quickly as we came in. We figured we’d go to the Jacuzzi again. There was only one couple in a cabana, but it was almost like they were sleeping. We made our way into the Jacuzzi where things started getting hot and heavy before we got out and made a bee-line for the cabanas. Kind of an awkward thing when the bartender is putting the mattress down and adjusting the pillows for you while you’re just standing there with a hard dick. Love the effort though! Once again, such a great experience even if there wasn’t anyone around. I had wanted there to be at least a few couples around who we could see f**king or see us f**king. But this was still as great as I had hoped going into the trip. When we finished, we went back to our room for the night.
Day 3-
This was the day of our presentation. We had breakfast in the morning and then went to the presentation at 9am. Claudia asked us up front to be honest with her if this was something that would not work out, but also requested we have an open mind. We said ok even though I had no intention on buying in. Nothing against Desire, but I don’t think timeshares/memberships work out long time. Every person I know who has had one regrets it eventually. Anyways, she walked us through the whole thing. Showed us details for Grand Miches, the plans for Eden, and everything else. Looks and sounds great until you see the $19k price tag. As I had said before, we have a 2 year old who is our priority right now. As great as this vacation was, we have other priorities in our life right now. We told Claudia it was going to be a no. Unfortunately, no wasn’t what she wanted to hear so we went through a couple of rounds of sweetening the pot and even bringing her boss over to further incentivize us. We stayed strong and said no. Eventually she gave up and took us back to the lobby for our massage vouchers. We had our erotic massages at 12. To say I was hyped up is an understatement. But when we got there we were told we were signed up for the erotic ritual which apparently is only light caresses, no actual massage, and no intimate touching. I asked how that could be if I was there when Ivan called to book the massage and he even wrote down “erotic massage” on our reminder paper. I asked if we could switch it to the erotic massage which had all the fun stuff. They told me yes, but that the erotic massage was part of the fantasy menu and the voucher did not apply to that. They said I would have to pay the entire $500+, but that I could use the vouchers for a regular massage the next day. I was pissed because I felt (and still feel) like this was a bait and switch maneuver. But this massage was something both of us had fantasized about so I said I’ll pay for it. They led us to the locker room to change into robes, took us in to the Jacuzzi room for 30 minutes to set the mood. Then they came and brought us to the massage room. I had Caro and my wife had Julio. It started out like any other massage, but at some point the music changes and you know what’s up. Pretty soon they ask you to flip on your back, drag the sheet down your bodies, start pouring the oil, and the fun begins. I knew she would put a cover over my eyes, but that immediately was moved out of the way. I wanted to watch my wife have another man run his hands all over her sexy body, and eventually play with her beautiful pussy that only I had ever touched. It was incredibly hot watching her start to squirm under his hands while Caro stroked my cock and let her hands roam all over my body and down my ass. I could see an orgasm building as she spread her legs for easier access. At that point, they motioned for me to get up and start massaging and playing with her pussy as well. They directed my cock into her mouth, which she willingly started sucking. It was a wild experience as I had Caro rubbing my ass and balls, Julio rubbing her tits, and me playing with her pussy. Needless to say, she didn’t last long after that. From there, they wiped some of the oil from her pussy and directed me to start eating her out. You don’t have to tell me twice! She’s always good for 2 orgasms back to back, but this was a new record. She was there within 2 minutes if that. Then they have me get on top of her and f**k her. I had planned on asking them to leave as I thought it would be distracting. They stayed and continued to play with us. Caro kept stroking my balls and sliding her hand up and down my ass. Julio was rubbing her sexy legs and smacking her ass a little bit while I fucked her. I regret to say it wasn’t my best performance and I came much earlier than I would have wanted. It was that hot. I know posters on this forum have said the erotic massage is overpriced or you can have another couple do this for free with some reciprocation, but for a couple who is “lifestyle light”, this was the best experience we could have hoped for. It was mind-blowing and definitely the highlight of the trip. We will do it again when we visit in the future. And in the grand scheme of things, the cost isn’t very prohibitive given what all of us are paying to even stay there to begin with. Just my two cents. We left very satisfied customers, all while hearing another woman in the back audibly enjoying her massage as well. We went to the beach cabanas again, proudly walking the resort naked. Funny what sex does to your ego. We spent the afternoon at the beach, cleaned up, went to dinner, drank by the lobby bar, watched the entertainment and everyone dancing, and then headed up to the club. As stated previously, we’re not partyers and didn’t ever get out on the dance floor, but we just enjoyed each other and maybe some people watching. Kudos to everyone 10-20 years older than us but getting out there like its senior prom. It’s just not us, and that’s ok. After watching on the sideline a bit, hands started roaming again. We took off for the playroom like 2 horny teenagers. There wasn’t anyone in there at the time, but that didn’t stop us. It was just as exciting knowing someone could walk in at any second while I had my cock in my wife. We’re learning that we lean towards exhibitionism a little bit. We finished up and were getting dressed as another couple started walking in. Too bad. I would have enjoyed the sights and sounds of another couple, but it wasn’t meant to be. From there, we went back to the room.
Day 4-
This was our last full day. Was very much like the others. Breakfast, pool/beach, dinner, nightly entertainment, and club again. This time we told ourselves that we would wait to have our fun in the playroom in hopes there would be another couple in there. In the meantime, my wife started giving me the lap dance of a lifetime. Every dress she wore on the trip was slutty and almost more skin showing than was covered. So when she started moving those hips and grinding on me, I knew that dress was riding up and every one walking by had to be mesmerized by her sexy body. I couldn’t take the tease anymore so we went to the playroom again. As we were getting undressed, 2 other couples walked in, but were just checking it out and left when we started making our way onto the mattresses. We didn’t keep it from enjoying ourselves though. It was just as hot for me the second time as the night before. At this point, I don’t know if we are just unlucky and need to stay up later or if no one really uses the playroom.
Day 5-
Travel day. Breakfast in the morning. One last lay. Then off to the airport. Both of us smiling to each other that all that really happened and wondering if we’ll have the guts to tell any of our friends or recommend they go themselves.
Odds and Ends:
As far as age goes, I’d say the majority of people were in the 40’s and 50’s. There were some in their 30’s like us, but definitely not many. And on the other end, there were some in their 60’s and even 70’s. I know this varies week to week, but that was our experience.
I know it’s been said a million times, but don’t worry about what you look like. Yeah there are some good looking people who are really fit and muscular, but the vast majority of people are just normal people. Everyone has their flaws, but confidence is the sexiest trait to have. I have told my wife how sexy she is for years, but she always seems to find a flaw in her body. I think this trip was amazing for her confidence going forward. Even she admitted that on the way home.
Unsure what to wear for dinner? I suggest the sluttier the better. Buy some dresses that you’d never wear at home. Fashion Nova was our friend leading up to the trip. She definitely had my attention when she had them on. And she got quite a few head turns and compliments from other guests, one guy even declining to pass us on the walkway because he was enjoying the view from behind us.
It is crazy how unbelievably horny you get there. Like I said before, we have a great sex life, but both of us were usually always in the mood and my wife seemed to always have a wet pussy even if she wasn’t “mentally there”.
Again, if you’re on the fence about the erotic massage, do it! I’d recommend nailing down the details about the erotic massage and the voucher beforehand to avoid the bait and switch.
Everyone talks about how the guests are so friendly and outgoing. I’m not saying they’re not, but my wife was a little apprehensive about that because we typically keep to ourselves at home never mind a sex/lifestyle friendly resort. She always felt like we were there for us, not necessarily to make friends. I was ok with either option; if we hit it off with a couple, great. If not, no big deal. As it turns out, because we stayed on the fringes whether at the pool, beach, or bar, we didn’t mingle a whole lot with people. Just goes to show, you can make the trip what you want. If you want to get out there you can. If you want to keep to yourselves and just reconnect with your partner, you can certainly do that too.
I read a lot about tipping on the forums. I don’t know if people just talk a big game online or if this forum is a very small subset of the actual guests, because we rarely saw people tip. The bartenders would have a tip jar set up and it did fill up throughout the night, but considering how many drinks they’re serving, it’s really not that much. And I don’t know if I saw anyone tip at meals. That being said, it didn’t keep us from tipping. I’m sure they don’t make much, but every employee we came in contact with was always so friendly and helpful. At meals we would have the same waiters who got to know us. We wanted to show our appreciation.
We will definitely be going again. I didn’t want to fly too close to the sun so I suggested another trip for our 15th wedding anniversary, but the wife surprised me by saying maybe we can go in 2 years since that will mark 20 years total together. That’s when I know Desire had her. Can’t wait to see what the resort looks like with the addition of The Eden. And maybe just maybe we’re able to stay up a little later to get into some naughtier fun.
Anyways, sorry for the extremely long trip report. Just wanted to share all the details we can’t tell our friends. Plus I wanted to help any prospective yellow banders like us.

Cacouple1014

[werfun]

We loved your review about your first Desire trip. It sounded a lot like our first Desire trip to Cabo in 2008. The only difference is my wife is a chatty cathy with anyone who looks at her, I always tell her that there no strangers in her life just friends that she has yet to met. I bet your next trip will be sooner then 2 years.

[Yeipi]

Great report! Thanks!
So true that one of the best things about Desire is that you can manage it the way you want... If you want to avoid the crowd, you can... If you want to party with others, you can. It's just a matter of finding the dynamics that work for the couple.

And I agree with werfun: 2 years is a long wait! Find an excuse to go sooner

[cthomasmd]

Thanks for the newbie report. We are there in March 2024. Newbies. Going with an open mind and just to have fun. Your review like the others have posted is extremely helpful!

[K+C]

That was a fun read. Thanks for taking the time to share your experiences.

[tonysoprano]

This was an incredible read, thanks for sharing!!

p.s., we've been talking about going back ever since we got home from our first trip (July 2023), I was able to use her birthday next year as an excuse to go back sooner

[243Xfun]

Thanks the review
We fly out tomorrow (yellow banders)

[Ambernos]

Our experience the first time was exactly the same, many details they described, such as 'headache,' also happened to us. In January, we return, and this will be the sixth trip since 2019. The first week of January is already a tradition.