Tips for Newbies - Desire Riviera Maya

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Tips for Newbies - Desire Riviera Maya

Postby dcnewbies703 » Fri Sep 11, 2015 3:27 pm

Thought we would write some about tips for first-timers. Here are a few, not necessarily the most important ones, but perhaps helpful:

General
    (A) Talk about the trip ahead of time, enjoying the anticipation and also exploring what behavior is and isn't OK with you.
    (B) Relax. After the initial butterflies driving up to the resort and walking through the glass doors, you'll quickly be put at ease by the super-friendly staff and the guests. One of the best things about Desire is it provides a context to meet new people and learn interesting things from them, in a way that most of us do not have many opportunities to do in our real lives. Of course, the possible flirtation or more adds to the fun as well as the uniqueness. You'll have a blast.
    (C) Get into the theme nights. Not everyone does, but it makes the anticipation of the trip more fun and it also facilitates mixing and mingling in the evenings, since it gives people an opportunity to compliment you, ask where you got the outfit, compare outfits, etc.
    (D) Take insect repellent, and cortisone or benadryl cream for relief of bug bit itching. Better to have it and not need it than need it and not have it.
    (E) Don't spray alcohol-based sunscreen on your genitals. Ouch! But do use sunscreen. The lower latitude and being around water much of the time means even if you don't normally have problems with the sun, you can easily get a painful sunburn that will reduce your enjoyment of the rest of the trip.
    (F) Don't feel like you need to plan excursions, especially for your first visit. There will be plenty to do just absorbing and getting used to the vibe at the resort, and then relaxing and soaking it in.
    (G) We've never had a problem with the food or the tap water at the resort. Don't worry that you're going to get Montezuma's Revenge because you're in Mexico.
    (H) Bring plenty of U.S. dollar bills. Although tipping is not required, nor will you be encouraged to tip, the staff almost all go out of their way to be accommodating, and a dollar or two occasionally to bartenders, waiters, porters, etc. is always appreciated and almost always deserved. (We usually leave a little more than that -- $5 or so -- at the evening restaurants, as well as more for the woman who cleans the room when we leave.)
    (I) Don't assume that you need to pay extra for special meal items or bottles of wine. We've found that the included fare (i.e., not things like lobsters for which there is an upcharge) is of good quality and presentation, and the house wines compare well with high-volume U.S. brands like Kendall-Jackson, Chateau Ste. Michelle, J. Lohr, Hess, Coppola, etc.
    (J) Head for the jacuzzi between 5 and 5:30 pm. That's the best time to get a spot and to be able to move around enough to meet different people.
    (K) Pass on the offer to get freebies for listening to the pitch to become members of Desire. (Not sure they even do that for first-timers.) There's no way you'll be able to judge whether you want to invest in future visits until you've gone there at least one or two times to see if it's really something you can see yourself doing many times. (On the other hand, there are many of us on this site who have already returned way more than we would have imagined when we first visited, and who could have saved a lot of money if we'd known that early-on and joined as members.)
    (L) Guys (this seems to mostly be a guy issue), don't assume that just because a naked woman is walking by you, or is standing in the pool talking to you, it's OK to grab/fondle her. Either ask it she minds if you touch her, or wait for a very clear signal that it is.
    (M) Don't assume that everyone at Desire is a full-swap couple (i.e., enjoys having intercourse with others) or is open to any kind of contact with someone other than their partners. Other than weeks when some "lifestyle group" is at the resort, the distribution typically, from our observations over about 10 trips, breaks down to something like: one-third full-swap swingers; one-third people who are open to some kind of sexual touching, which might for some go as far as oral sex, with others but not intercourse; and one-third people who just enjoy being naked and in the sexy environment of Desire, but don't care to do anything with anyone other than their partner. It's all good and accepted at Desire.
    (N) If you have a lot of clothes you want to hang up, bring a few hangers. The closet in the room will have 8 or 10, but we've often found we wanted more.
    (O) If you have really high heels or have had a lot to drink, access the disco by the outdoor stairs (to the left, around the corner from the gift shop) when facing the registration area from the fountains), rather than taking the spiral staircase across from the registration area, which can be difficult to navigate.
    (P) Don't be afraid to check out the play room or "sin room" (unmarked door tucked in a short dark hallway, to the back of the left side of the bar, facing the bar from the dance floor). It's perfectly OK to wander in, look around, sit down on one of the beds (or not), and then wander out. Going in and checking it out, or even spreading out a towel and taking your clothes off, is not an invitation for others to join you, although they might ask if they may. It's OK to look, and it's OK to say no.
    (Q) You may want a fanny pack or wrist wallet to carry your room key and some essentials, as the outfits people wear (or don't wear) at Desire often don't have pockets! Some people bring a lanyard with an ID pouch on it to carry their room key, at least.
    (R) Use USA Transfers (see link at top of the Forums index page) to get to and from the resort. You don't need a car, unless you're planning to go to Chichen Itza or Tulum, and USA Transfers is quick and less expensive than other services or a cab. (For example, the cab from Desire RM to the airport this time was $45; USA Transfers is $35.)

More Specific
    (1) Men never wear suits. Slacks and dress shirt are fine, and a significant portion of men never dress up beyond baggy shorts and T-shirts.
    (2) The average women's body at Desire is better than at Walmart or the PTA meeting and not as good as Jacksonville during Spring Break. By its nature, Desire tends to attract guests who care about their appearance. We also noticed this trip that over half the women appeared to have had cosmetic surgery of some sort on their boobs. While you'll see some stunning figures, most women look like relatively height and weight proportionate soccer moms, not Barbies or models. One of the great things about Desire is that you will see and meet people with a wide range of figures, from rail-thin to Melissa McCarthy chubby or more, but folks are for the most part all treated equally by other guests and judged much more by their personalities than by their appearance. Women tend to obsess over body issues, while men tend to think most women look hot with their clothes off. (And most men seem to think they look hot no matter how big their beer belly!)
    (3) Last weekend, the average age was probably 48. There were a handful of 20-somethings and a few 60-somethings, but most were probably in their late 30s to mid 50s. As someone observed this trip, most of us are behaving and partying like we're decades younger, and our kids would never believe we're out drinking and dancing til 2 am!
    (4) For the Masquerade theme, 40% at best of the people wore masks. Women tended to dress up a little more that night (if you can call see-through dresses, plunging necklines, corsets, and lacy lingerie dressing up!); men tending to dress the same as usual.
    (5) There are definitely still things going on after midnight. There usually is a band until 10 or 10:30 at the lobby bar area, at which time people gravitate upstairs to the disco, which is open until until 2:00 (although often only a few people are left by then). The rooftop jacuzzi is open until 3:00 (at which time there may be no one, or there may be a dozen people still there). There are usually some folks hanging around the lobby bar significantly later than that. (It's open all night, and they serve great made to order pizzas.)

And of course, read the posts on this site!

Enjoy!

R & E
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Re: Tips for Newbies - Desire Riviera Maya

Postby CaptainR » Fri Sep 11, 2015 10:43 pm

Now that was a great write up and very helpful. We are taking our first trip to RM in the first week of October and this helps us a lot.

Thanks! :L
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Re: Tips for Newbies - Desire Riviera Maya

Postby Ladybug9614 » Mon Sep 14, 2015 12:19 pm

Thanks for posting. I've read a TON of trip reports on this forum- but it's nice to have a list like that.
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Re: Tips for Newbies - Desire Riviera Maya

Postby lovelydorks » Mon Sep 14, 2015 4:24 pm

Thanks for the post! Great info! We just came back from RM and I DID experience issues with food/water. We've been three times and the stomach issues usually clear within the first two days, however this time they did not. I am not a heavy drinker, so I know the issues had to do with food/water. Cramps, pain, and "stuff" followed. Began taking Pepto-Bismol chewable tabs and that helped immensely! Would recommend taking two tabs with each meal if you are someone prone to stomach stuff. I am a vegetarian and did not eat the meat. I also avoided all raw veggies and I STILL got the stomach issues. I did eat some guacamole and wonder if that might have been the culprit!

Also, I got a sore throat very early on in the trip and attribute it to the glasses only being dunked in sani-wash at the bars. Cup turnover is very high and very fast! I began taking vitamin C a week before the trip and took some when the throat gunk began and that tamed it. Would recommend taking vitamin C tabs before and during the trip. Also, bring some ginger or peppermint candies to help with the stomach issues. I wish I had brought more than I did! They do sell the Pepto Tabs in the gift shop if you need them. Also, they sell coconut water drinks--good for rehydrating! Do be sure to take some rest in the afternoon or evening! It's easy to over do it! :)
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Re: Tips for Newbies - Desire Riviera Maya

Postby sixmonkeyes » Fri Oct 16, 2015 8:11 am

What an awesome post! As far as we are concerned, this is the highest and best possible use of this forum. We send our listeners to this site specifically for tips and specific advice just like this. Congratulations. Very well done!
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Re: Tips for Newbies - Desire Riviera Maya

Postby canadiantakeover » Fri Oct 16, 2015 10:34 am

dcnewbies703 wrote:(1) Men never wear suits. Slacks and dress shirt are fine, and a significant portion of men never dress up beyond baggy shorts and T-shirts.


Boo. Totally had a suit jacket and top hat for dress-up night... and a Mr. Monopoly moustache!
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Re: Tips for Newbies - Desire Riviera Maya

Postby sandybeachkim » Sat Oct 31, 2015 5:45 pm

Awesome report, especially for first-timers to Desire RM. Much appreciated and we always enjoy the trip reports, the more intimate and sensual, the better together with some helpful tips along the way ... Cheers.
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Re: Tips for Newbies - Desire Riviera Maya

Postby Mr_big60564 » Tue Jan 26, 2016 11:42 am

A couple other tips for Newbies in addition to the great list from the OP:

1 - Realize that the wifi is free and (usually) working fine, even in the guest rooms. Unless you need to be in perfect communication for work, don't stress about emergency phone numbers, international calling plans, etc. Just put your phone in airplane mode before you leave the US (so you don't get dinged for international data charges), activate the wifi at Desire, and tell friends/family that you'll be reachable via Facebook (or whatever social media app you favor) at any time. And you can use free apps like WhatsApp and Messenger to make free voice calls from inside the wifi!

2 - That being said, do not get your phone out in the areas of the resort where nude people are. That is frowned upon, for obvious reasons. If you must check your phone, do it very discreetly or leave to check it in a different area.

3 - Agree that there aren't enough hangers in the closet. Bring a few more. Other helpful items to bring include a power strip (not a ton of outlets in the hotel rooms), powdered flavor crystals/gatorade to put into your water bottles when re-hydrating, and an insulated mug (such as a Bubba or Tervis) to help keep your drinks extra chilled...they will happily fill them for you.

4 - Tipping and the amount you tip is a personal decision. And obviously the staff works hard and are great. But at a bare minimum bring $100-200 in $1 and $5 bills to distribute as you go. Not necessarily *every* *single* *time* you get a drink or whatever -- and it's hard to have money handy when you're naked sometimes! -- but just show your appreciation periodically. The smiles and appreciation you get when you leave a couple bucks for a helpful person are worth it, and you won't miss $100 from your life in the grand scheme of things. (there is a whole separate thread about whether the staff pools the tips to share, but that is beside the point...the person you give a buck or two to is having a positive personal contact directly with you, which is what makes it worthwhile)

5 - All those fears about being embarrassed to be naked, or that swingers are going to jump out and start humping on you, or that you couldn't possibly wear a slutty outfit in public. Please realize that those are natural fears of the unknown, and that they are honestly, truly, unfounded at Desire. You won't be judged or mistreated based on how you look. The panicked feeling of taking off your top or bottoms in public goes away quickly when you realize you are surrounded by other people who have done the same -- and when you realize how much you've just thrilled your spouse. Yes there are swingers there. Yes they will likely talk to you. Yes in the back of their mind they may be trying to figure out whether you want to swing with them. But they have no expectations. A friendly chat is just a friendly chat, don't make it out to be more than that. And finally, yes, wear that slutty outfit. No matter how slutty it is, it will not be the sluttiest outfit on display that night -- I guarantee it. And again, your mate will be absolutely thrilled. [BTW - I am calling it a "slutty" outfit from the perspective of a guy who loves slutty outfits. If the term "slutty" puts you off, then scratch that and insert the word "daringly sexy" instead. My message to you remains unchanged.]

6 - Check out all the areas of the resort, including the Sin Room and the Jacuzzi. Don't avoid them because you think they may be too hard core for your tastes. At least go take a peek. Nothing bad is going to happen to you, and once you get there you may realize that there is a way to use those spaces that is completely compatible with your tastes and limits.

7 - This has been said elsewhere, but the coffee/espresso/cappuccino/lattes at the lobby bar are WAY better than the coffee that they serve in the restaurants. I always grab a latte at the lobby bar on my way to breakfast! Again, give the guy a smile and $1 when he serves you...the good karma is worth it!

Hope these thoughts help!
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Re: Tips for Newbies - Desire Riviera Maya

Postby miranda2 » Tue Jan 26, 2016 12:55 pm

Thanks, Mr_big60504, for your insights, tips and hints. We especially love #2. We find there is nothing more annoying than hearing someone's conversation on their cell phone while we are lying around the pool and or the beach. I don't think anyone wants to listen to your conversation while we are on vacation. If the conversation is that important, take it elsewhere - pretty please.

Good call on the coffee and that's exactly what we do. The fresh cappuccinos and espresso drinks at the bar are the best.

Too bad we'll just miss you. I think we would have gotten along famously. :D
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Re: Tips for Newbies - Desire Riviera Maya

Postby Mr_big60564 » Tue Jan 26, 2016 1:15 pm

miranda2 wrote:Thanks, Mr_big60504, for your insights, tips and hints. We especially love #2. We find there is nothing more annoying than hearing someone's conversation on their cell phone while we are lying around the pool and or the beach. I don't think anyone wants to listen to your conversation while we are on vacation. If the conversation is that important, take it elsewhere - pretty please.

Good call on the coffee and that's exactly what we do. The fresh cappuccinos and espresso drinks at the bar are the best.

Too bad we'll just miss you. I think we would have gotten along famously. :D


Thanks Miranda -- agree on all of the above. :wink:

We've enjoyed reading your posts on the forum over the past couple years. Thanks and keep it up! Maybe our paths will cross sometime?
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Re: Tips for Newbies - Desire Riviera Maya

Postby CokeMann » Tue Jan 26, 2016 1:27 pm

miranda2 wrote:We find there is nothing more annoying than hearing someone's conversation on their cell phone while we are lying around the pool and or the beach. I don't think anyone wants to listen to your conversation while we are on vacation. If the conversation is that important, take it elsewhere - pretty please.

:L :L :L :L :L
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Re: Tips for Newbies - Desire Riviera Maya

Postby JayAndDee » Sun Jan 31, 2016 1:59 am

Thanks for sharing the knowledge!
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Re: Tips for Newbies - Desire Riviera Maya

Postby Desireus2 » Tue Mar 01, 2016 1:10 pm

Bring US $2 bills for tips. They are considered to be "lucky" by the locals. We always make a trip to the bank before we go. One $2 will elicit more of a positive reaction then two $1s.

Disagree on the coat. I have worn a Tux to some of the "Mansion nights."
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Re: Tips for Newbies - Desire Riviera Maya

Postby CokeMann » Tue Mar 01, 2016 1:20 pm

Desireus2 wrote:Bring US $2 bills for tips. They are considered to be "lucky" by the locals.

I really don't know where this "urban legend" started but it is completely bogus.

Money is money and staff appreciate tips however you want to give them, whether in USD or Pesos.

Just remember the staff can't pay their bills in USD, they have to get those $$ converted to Pesos before they can actually spend them...
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Re: Tips for Newbies - Desire Riviera Maya

Postby Meb » Thu Mar 10, 2016 11:38 pm

I always appreciate an in depth trip description. Being we will be newbies when we arrive it's always good to get a breakdown of the place. Thanks!
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