Noobs

[OhThatCpl]

Hey y'all! This is my first post. I'm a long time admirer and finally have the nerve to post / ask questions. We are looking to book a 5 day stay at Desire to celebrate our 5 year anniversary. Our expectation are minimal: a relaxing and seductive environment. From all that we have read Desire offers all of this and more.

We are an adventurous and open minded couple, not 'lifestylers' (is that even the correct term, ha?). We are an easy going couple definitely open to meeting new people and welcome the idea of entertaining other sensual escapades that may present themselves. So, the clothing optional and various groups that may attend during our stay are not an issue. We welcome that

I want to make a informed decision on when / where to stay. I've read a lot and lean towards stay at Pearl vs. Riviera Maya. Any opinions on why not stay there for our first visit? When is the best time of year to go? We had planned on going April 2016.

Some other questions: What Theme nights do you recommend for first timers? Is there a specific attire for the men during the Theme nights?

Last but not least. My husband has a bit of a tummy and I worry he will feel judged by others. I have tried to reassure him to not worry about it. Any comments here? As for me I will start out slow. Thong and topless... then bam! Naked as a jaybird, ha!

We want our first experience to be positive, and if we go in knowing as much as possible beforehand, it stands a much greater chance of being a success. I apologize now I am sure most of these questions are annoying or are frequently asked.

[pretzelandgeek]

Hi Kimber,
While we too are noobs to Pearl (we get there this Sunday!) we have been to other C/O places (SMI, Burning Man Orgy Dome) and I can tell you this: something really cool and magical happens when everybody is naked and in love and happy. And that cool thing is ... Nobody Cares. It's the greatest thing ever. Nobody cares what you look like. Nobody cares what you do for a living. Instead, it's like we are totally in the moment and just ... happy. At peace.

The other cool thing that happens is that the whole place is like a Love Amplifier. I look at my wife who I love more than anything and I can't imagine loving her more and then - poof! - you're in a pool with other naked couples who, themselves, are in the Love Amplifier, and it's like ... I love her even MORE. As if that was even possible. And then there's this feedback loop that amplifies that love even more when it's reflected against everybody else.

I, too, have a gut, and it never occurs to me to care. I love looking at all the bodies because naked happy love-gushing people are the best. And I assume that feeling is reflected off of everybody else. It's a crazy thing. I would love to read a psychology makeup on what happens to our perception in these situations.

Anyway, tell the hubster not to worry even an iota. You two are going to love it. And bravo for taking the plunge!

Paul

[Lavinth10]

We too were new to Desire two years ago, and since then we've made it an annual "must vacation". There are a few things of why we choose Desire over all the other nice resorts.

Off the top of my head...
1. Desire is the most sensual experience a couple can find at a Resort, its about us.
2. Customer service is 1st class.
3. Couples are there to enjoy their time with each other and in some cases include other couples in their expedition in life. Everyone we have met at Desire have been extremely friendly, I believe it has nothing to do with our age (30s), but its that kind of guests you will find.
4. I've noticed a difference in two terms, in our own dictionary, Swingers and Lifestylers. Both are completely different in our eyes. A swinger has matured to a point in life that "open" sexual activity is for each others pleasure, fantasy, etc. A lifestyler enjoys the sexually charged atmosphere, will be involved in all activities, including games, going nude, play, etc, but rarely do they have sex with others. Keyword "rarely".
5. Size, age doesn't matter. No one cares at the end of the day. Everyone is there to enjoy their time away from reality and make the most of it.
6. Participate in the things that will make you comfortable and enjoy the moment. Once you leave the resort your already looking at the calendar for the next trip back.

So very quick, our first trip we were to ourselves for the most part, because we were nervous 1st timers to that type of place. Eventually we relaxed and enjoyed the time among ourselves. No one ever bothered us or cast judgement on us. However, on our second trip, both of us broke free from the acceptable social engineering we are taught from an early age. We got rid of clothes easier, and we participated in the fun pool games, themes, etc. By the end of the trip, we were connected, rejuvenated, and finally got to enjoy our time. We are waiting with great anticipation to go back, and the bar has been reset once again. We don't consider ourselves swingers, but we are definitely in the Lifestyle and enjoy the moment, because you only live once.

Feel free to PM with questions. Enjoy life, its too short!

[goldfish1]

Melissa and I went for our first time in April and it was amazing. However you should go in early October of this year because that's when my wife and I will be there. You can also got some ly good deals now. You and your husband have nothing to fear. He should read my post in the general talk section "Women are disproportionately hotter than men". He might get a kick out of it.

[OhThatCpl]

Thank you all for your encouragement and responses!! My husband and I really appreciate it. He will undoubtedly fit it. Especially when he gets the lay of the land. From what I understand, after several reads, is we ladies are disproportionately hotter than men. Correct me if I am wrong her

[OhThatCpl]

Thank you all for your encouragement and responses!! My husband and I really appreciate it. He will undoubtedly fit it. Especially when he gets the lay of the land. From what I understand, after several reads, is we ladies are disproportionately hotter than men. Correct me if I am wrong her

[Houston_Couple]

Thank you all for your encouragement and responses!! My husband and I really appreciate it. He will undoubtedly fit it. Especially when he gets the lay of the land. From what I understand, after several reads, is we ladies are disproportionately hotter than men. Correct me if I am wrong her

I wouldn't go that far. We just got back from a long weekend at Pearl and it seemed like a lot of the couples had more physically fit male than the female. It's always fun regardless though.

[Jude1000]

Thank you all for your encouragement and responses!! My husband and I really appreciate it. He will undoubtedly fit it. Especially when he gets the lay of the land. From what I understand, after several reads, is we ladies are disproportionately hotter than men. Correct me if I am wrong her

Jude's OH here... you are absolutely correct. Desire is all about the ladies and your husband need have no concerns (tummy-wise he won't stand out from almost all the other men, including me). We go along with all the theme nights, Jude dresses up every time in whatever best fits the theme; I try - with varying degrees of success - to follow the theme for some evenings but most men don't do much, leaving it all to the ladies. But just do what you're comfortable with and enjoy. There will be no pressure from anyone to do anything and no one will judge. We don't consider ourselves swingers, but we do see ourselves as in the Lifestyle. October 2015 at Pearl will be really good!

[TandD]

I want to make a informed decision on when / where to stay. I've read a lot and lean towards stay at Pearl vs. Riviera Maya. Any opinions on why not stay there for our first visit? When is the best time of year to go? We had planned on going April 2016.

Some other questions: What Theme nights do you recommend for first timers?

The others have covered pretty much everything. For your specific questions - I can't think of any reason *not* to go to Pearl in April for your first visit. We went last year in late March and the weather was perfect. We've only been to Pearl (twice) and we think it was the perfect place to go. By *most* accounts, Pearl is slightly fancier (?) so I think it is a great choice to ease into things (not that you really need to).

As for theme nights, I don't think it makes much difference so I wouldn't let it sway your attendance dates. In my opinion, the themes are more like suggestions and besides, they are relatively vague - "glamorous night" - so it doesn't really matter. The overall theme for every night is "sexy/slutty" so 1) anything goes and 2) it really mostly applies to the gals.

Hope this helps! Welcome to the club!

[OhThatCpl]

Thank you everyone for all of the great advice. We have booked our 1st trip and can't wait!

So, this will our first trip to DP. My husband and I are both very excited! We both have a fantasy of being watched and watching others. I know from what I've read this will likely not be an issue and we welcome that. Especially at the jacuzzi area or in the sin room (or is it called the play room).

Before I go on I should mention we've never swapped nor are we in the lifestyle. We are adventurous and open minded.

Okay, here I go. I'm have a fascination to really perform for my hubby while he watches. Perhaps a MFM situation. I'd love for me to be the center of attention if that makes sense. If it's guys and girls all the better.

I'm just curious about the etiquette involved or how to initiate something like this? I do NOT want to offend anyone and want to be cognizant of others feelings or rules regarding this. Any assistance is appreciate.

Kimber & Marc