Our first trip July 2021, lessons learned. We will be back!

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Our first trip July 2021, lessons learned. We will be back!

Postby AandJW » Wed Jul 28, 2021 3:07 pm

Hello Everyone,

It will be difficult to bottle such an incredible life experience into a report like this, but I’ll do my best. My wife and I stayed in the mansion for seven nights. This was our first ever trip to a lifestyle/clothing optional resort, and our first trip away from home since we met four years ago.

TRAVEL / CHECK-IN
Our arrival and check in was as smooth as could be. From the time we grabbed our luggage at the airport, it was a short walk to find our driver, and we didn’t touch our luggage again until it arrived in our room. Our butler Michelle offered us a nice walking tour of the resort before arriving at our room, and helped us make a plan and some reservations for dinner that evening as well as the following morning.

ACCOMMODATION / AMENITIES
I read many less than enthused reviews about the location of the mansion but I must admit, it suited our tastes perfectly. The beach is not within immediate view, there is little foot traffic and the atmosphere is generally pretty quiet. We found this to be a welcomed offset to the busier parts of the resort, and it offered us a nice retreat during the morning and early evening hours in between various other events of the day. The bed was great, bathroom nice and we enjoyed having the spacious shower especially since ours at home is not nearly as inviting for two to share. The balcony above the ground floor offered us the option for conversation with those below, without putting us directly in walking paths of others.

POOL / HOT TUB
Chairs on the busier end of the pool, beds on the quieter end. The natural separation of the two ends suited us great. We found escape and privacy when we wanted it, and still were only a float away from the fun and activity close by. The hot tub seems to be the feature attraction of the resort and the center of a lot of meet and greet activity in the afternoon, as well as a bit more in the evenings. We did not discover until late in our trip that it was a big meeting place at around 5:00 every day, as well as later in the evenings after the shows at the disco. In the future, we will definitely plan not to miss this as it was a lot of fun.

FOOD
I eat at restaurants the same way I watch movies at the theater. I’m not there to be critical - I’m there to enjoy myself. My wife and I didn’t have a meal we didn’t like. Each restaurant offered a different menu and by the end of the trip, we found it difficult to choose which to repeat. Suki probably topped our list, though I was partial to the Mexican food at Aphrodite too. Service at every location was as great as any place I’ve dined at, too.

PEOPLE
I hope you’re still with me, because this is the good stuff. The people we met, and connected with. I’m not even sure where to begin. We formed new, meaningful relationships with folks that I don’t know if I could describe to anyone at home. People here really, really care about each other. They care about who you are, and want to know your story. I am a tall, very large man of the muscular variety. Large enough in fact that in my life’s experience, most women appear to be intimidated by my size. I can count on very few fingers the times I’ve ever been complimented about my physical appearance by a woman. At Pearl, I experienced something I was completely unprepared for. To be honest, it felt really, really good. Maybe it’s because people are just more forward, and honest. Maybe its the lack of inhibition. Anyway, I’ve always kind of felt like I lived inside a mutant body, though it is one I’ve worked very hard to attain. I felt a lot of walls come down among some very kind and caring people

My wife, who could have been fairly called the passenger to my fantasy on this trip, discovered her own life changing experience in the atmosphere and amongst so many folks. She found being openly nude to be an incredibly liberating and eye opening kind of moment, and immediately became the conversationalist of the two of us. It was powerful for me to witness her find a kind of pleasure in that environment I had not expected. She really loved the acceptance and carefree nature, and ease of conversation to say the least.

LESSONS LEARNED
This is extremely difficult to write but I hope by doing so, it might save even one person from enduring a night like the one my wife did.

I lost control of myself. I don’t know if it’s because I was so caught up in feeling like people were paying attention to me, or if it was because of having suppressed certain desires inside me for too long - not being honest with myself about them. In any event, my wife and I found ourselves talking to another couple. Well, sort of talking. The man was in the hot tub, and the woman up on one of the beds. I thought they were playing some cute hard to get game. I found her to be highly attractive and hoped my bride would see an interest in him. Truth is I don’t even know if I asked her how she felt. I just hoped she would. We later went to dinner with them on our last night at the resort. In hindsight, I wish we had spent our final evening of a beautiful vacation just the two of us, and stayed close to each other. We went to dinner, and had lots of conversation with the other couple. I spoke to the woman, and she spoke to the man, at length. We hardly spoke to each other at all. When we later went to the disco and show, we remained in the same state - together, but not. This was my doing. I was so fixated on another woman, I continued to lose my way. We had spent so much time talking and fantasizing together about a moment we might share with another couple during our trip. How close we would feel together, and how that moment, despite the inclusion of others, would truly revolve around the two of us. From the onset, it wasn’t so. I don’t even know where I was, but I know I wasn’t present with my wife. I was consumed in that moment that I lost sight of everything around me. In fact, she and the other man had lied quietly talked for more than a half hour and I didn’t even notice.

I took something that could have lifted us to an entirely new level of intimacy, and instead nearly destroyed our marriage in that moment. The whole experience has given us cause to look deeper within ourselves, especially within my own self, and uncover some really deep stuff and work through it. We have all the potential for a lifetime of amazing experiences at Desire, and are committed to each other.
So, the lessons learned? Know a red flag when you see one, and know when to say “Let’s step back a bit and talk about this before going forward”

That couple wasn’t playing hard to get at all. They barely knew each other, and cared about each other even less. They basically arrived for the chance to have sex with other people. Our dinner wasn’t intimate. In hindsight, I feel like my wife and I were both used for an end we wouldn’t have chosen.

I loved our vacation, and for one very difficult experience, we enjoyed a hundred magical ones. Sorry for such a long winded post but I am feeling pretty humbled by some mistakes I made and if nothing else, I hope sharing the story is payment forward for another new couple in what to look for. We met the most incredible people, felt like we really escaped to another world together and it opened up parts of us we will celebrate for many years ahead.
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AandJW
 
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Re: Our first trip July 2021, lessons learned. We will be ba

Postby werfun » Wed Jul 28, 2021 6:39 pm

Thank you for such an honest and insightful report on your first trip to Desire. Your report is very much what first time Desire guest experience. We found it refreshing that you were willing to cover a issue that many overlook. That many couples especially the male lose the reason for their Desire trip... that is to reconnect to your SO not to add notches to their bedpost. Again a wonderful trip report and being honest abut the pitfalls that may happen to first time guest.
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werfun
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Re: Our first trip July 2021, lessons learned. We will be ba

Postby AandJW » Wed Jul 28, 2021 7:10 pm

werfun wrote:Thank you for such an honest and insightful report on your first trip to Desire. Your report is very much what first time Desire guest experience. We found it refreshing that you were willing to cover a issue that many overlook. That many couples especially the male lose the reason for their Desire trip... that is to reconnect to your SO not to add notches to their bedpost. Again a wonderful trip report and being honest abut the pitfalls that may happen to first time guest.



Thank you. And the last thing I’d ever want to do is cast too big a shadow over some really beautiful memories. One night’s experience was not representative of our time together and with others. But at the same time, all it took was one time to make some regrettable errors. In the end, I am thankful for an endlessly caring and patient partner who remains open to the world we’ve only begun to explore. Here’s to a lot of value able experience gained, on all sides of the spectrum.
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AandJW
 
Posts: 7
Joined: Wed Mar 17, 2021 1:25 am
We are from: USA
Will be at: Desire Pearl
We arrive on: 14 Aug 2022
Swing Site(s) we belong to: SLS

Re: Our first trip July 2021, lessons learned. We will be ba

Postby werfun » Wed Jul 28, 2021 8:59 pm

Aman to your last post. Many of us husbands are very lucky to have wife's that are willing to forgive their husband's bone head actions such as you described on your part on you trip. I'm happy to so that that action didn't put a downer on your first trip and hopefully that you are planning another trip soon.
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Re: Our first trip July 2021, lessons learned. We will be ba

Postby STL-MO-CPL » Tue Aug 03, 2021 12:23 pm

We were fortunate enough to have met AandJW "virtually" in a chat group prior to our trip. They showed up a couple days after we arrived. JW is not joking about his physical presence. He is a mountain of a man. Both A and JW are very fit, they make a striking couple! We had a mixup one day on our beach bed at the quiet end of the pool and tried to sort it out with Victor, but there was yet more confusion. My wife approached JW and he was super generous and willing to trade spots. We can't say enough nice things about them. I'm happy to see that the overall trip experience was positive.
Hedo 6/11 11/13 7/23
DP 3/16 3/17 7/18 7/21 6/22 8/22
DRM 11/21
TGM 8/23
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