We recently returned from 5 days at Desire Pearl and wanted to share our experience for those considering a visit. I found this forum very useful in deciding whether to go at all, and in learning what to expect once we arrived. I read many posts and trip reports and picked up on some of the topics/concerns people had before arriving.
By way of background, we are married in our early 50’s, not in the lifestyle and not looking to enter it either. I was looking for something a bit more risqué that a vanilla resort but not the whole swinger party/play scene either, leaning more towards exhibitionism/nudist. Fair to say I was more enthusiastic about the opportunity than my wife but after sharing the details from the Desire website and several of the reviews from this forum with her, she agreed to come along. She made it very clear she would be keeping her swimsuit on the whole time though. I was hoping that her initial reluctance would gradually dissolve, and she’d end up getting into the spirit of things (many reports mentioned a reluctant partner changing their minds once they arrived at Desire), however I was determined not to put any pressure on her at all.
My first piece of advice is communicate better with your partner before deciding to go than I did with mine. As mentioned, I shared many reviews and articles about Desire with my wife in the hope she could make a fully informed decision in choosing to attend. What I should have done is pushed to see if she’d actually read any of them, and openly discussed the concept more deeply. What I had interpreted as “I’m a bit nervous but I’ll give it a go” sort of attitude (because that’s what I wanted to hear!) turned out to have been “I am really, really skeptical about this and I’m only going because you want to and would much rather be going somewhere else”. Lesson learned.
Arrival – We used USA transfers from the airport (or Aventour, the one on the Desire website anyway) and they were fine. Staff were where we were told to find them, although their uniforms didn’t quite match the color's we were told to expect in locating them. Quick trip to Desire Pearl with no issues, probably 35 minutes.
Check-in- was as described; lobby very serene and a lovely candle/diffuser aroma, sparkling wine given on arrival, process very smooth. They made a quite a point of taking us through the “golden rules”, which from the gravitas of the presentation and the requirement to sign acknowledgment led my wife to believe they were actually “rules”, particularly about where you can and cannot have sex (more on that later)! There was no high-pressure sales pitch about membership and while things were offered, a polite no did not seem to offend. While process took 25 minutes or so, and our room was ready (it was about 3:30pm at this time).
Room – we had a basic room on ground floor facing Ocean and quiet end of the pool and it was a great location (room 45 I think). Room itself was clean and as many say, probably 3-4 star in quality. A few little quirks around odd light switches, creaky doors, slightly dodgy water temperature modulation but no complaints and consistent with expectations.
The pool – as soon as we unpacked we went straight to the pool. By this time it was close to 4pm on a Sunday so there were people starting to head in or to the jacuzzi so we had no trouble getting a bed in the quiet zone. As per guidance I had seen here, I tipped the guys $10 and they quickly set us up. Having a chat (and a giving a $10 tip) to them every afternoon around 2pm helped us get set for the next day; for each of the 4 days we were there we were able to get a sun bed at the quiet end.
Swimsuits – I took mine off straight away and was barely clothed again all week. Having never been to a nude beach and really only being able to nude sun bake in our back yard at home, it was hugely liberating and I really enjoyed the experience. As mentioned, wife’s suit stayed on (☹). I reckon about 85% of men nude, probably 5% women with tops and bottoms on, another 10% with just bottoms and the rest of the ladies fully nude. Everyone respected the clothing in restaurants rule although apart from that, most people (including myself) walked around naked near pool and back and forth to rooms.
Age groups – from reading this forum, I was a little concerned we would be in the upper end of the age bracket being in our early 50’s. From observations and from over hearing some conversations, the age brackets during the week we were there were: under 35 0%, 35 to 45 10%, 45 to 55 (us) 10% 55 to 65 60% 65 and over 20%; median definitely 60+. The other thing I liked was the total body positivity on display; there were next to no buff gym junkies and every body shape and size you could imagine from petite to very portly (male and female) and it was great to see, and nobody was commenting or staring.
Golden Rules – okay well within 1 hour of signing the rules at reception, getting to our room, arriving at the pool and getting on our pool chairs on the quiet side and starting to read our books, my wife turns to see the women next to us give her partner a blow job and swallowing. We were not looking per se but this was right next to us. Rules aside, I have no issue at all and had been aware this might occur, but given (as it turned out) wifey had read none of the material/reviews I’d shared, she was quite confronted and was convinced I’d conned her into attending a swinger convention. I think this introduction did more than anything else to steel her resolve to keep her clothes on sadly. This was the only public display around the pool we witnessed (apart from a woman giving 2 guys a blow job during sexy darts) however we did witness quite a bit of sex on balconies etc after that. No staff member reprimanded the couple on the pool beds and the playmaker was actually encouraging the blow job during sexy darts! Sadly for us (me!) this made my wife believe that if blowjobs occurred where sex wasn’t permitted, what was she going to witness where sex was allowed, and she refused to go in the jacuzzi at all. She did however (and happily for me!) get a little into the mood, and later in the week would allow me to suck her nipples on the day bed, and she gave me several blowjobs on our patio while people were walking past.
Food – breakfast every morning was great, and the options for lunch by the pool were good too, particularly the pizza. Not 5 star but very good quality hotel buffet style with a fantastic omelette/grill station making food to order. The coffee hut each morning was fantastic too, particularly if you like espresso coffee. The staff were always friendly and eager to help. Our dinner experiences were not so good. We had heard about the members first system and there not being bookings for non-members, and found if you were not at Pearl or Suki/Jade before around 6:30 then you would be eating after 8:30pm. The fallback is supposed to be Aphrodite however one night it was inexplicably closed and quite a few guests were turned away from Pearl until after 9pm as there appeared to have been no back up plan. The food quality at both Jade and Pearl was really no better than Aphrodite really did feel a bit 3 star. Also the wine at Desire is extraordinarily expensive. I know there is a 40% tax in Mexico on wines, however I was familiar with a handful of wines on their wine list and the mark ups were over 600% above retail. The biggest challenge we faced however was around the staff’s understanding of food allergies. My wife has several gluten intolerance (Coeliac disease, not a fad gluten free diet) and I had discussed this with the staff prior to even planning the trip. The level of competence we saw from the staff on this was terrible; gluten free dishes would arrive with bread on it, certain foods that are made from wheat would be labelled gluten free etc. Sadly despite all our efforts to alert staff and choose carefully, my wife was served gluten on our 2nd night and was sick for the rest of our stay; she couldn’t even leave our room for 2 days. I gave this feedback to management but for other travellers with this condition, please be warned.
Disco, theme nights – we managed to watch a couple of the shows and my wife was well enough to attend the angels and demons night. We did bring costumes and I would recommend doing so, even for the guys. In most couples the woman wore the revealing/sexy attire and the male partners were mostly in the clothes they wore to dinner however there were exceptions so feel free to wear whatever you want and the less the better from observation. For example, my demon costume was just dark wings and a black g string, and there were several men in similar. We did go into the disco as my wife loves dancing; by this time she wasn’t as shocked when one woman gave her partner a blowjob on the dancefloor while another was riding her husband on a chair (to be fair, the staff moved both of them into the sin room). That night we only saw about 20 people in the disco, and assume everyone else was at the jacuzzi, however as mentioned we never ventured there at all which I regret.
Gym/Spa – The gym is quite good and when I went (early morning) not crowded. We didn’t get any massages however the spa/sauna/steam room was terrific.
Beach - we had strong onshore winds the whole stay, so the poor staff were constantly trying to clear the seaweed and did as a good a job as anyone could but it was futile, but there was no foul odor. We saw the same problem at several resorts along the beach toward and away from Puerto Morales during our morning walks. The wind also led to there being next to no beach, and the beach chairs were hardly used.
Overall, I really enjoyed my stay at Desire Pearl however it was not my wife’s thing so I don’t think we will be back.