First Timers-Vanilla no more, Feb. 2018

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First Timers-Vanilla no more, Feb. 2018

Postby SingleMalt77 » Wed Feb 28, 2018 7:44 pm

My wife and I just returned from our first trip to Desire Pearl and… wow. Just… wow. There have been some really detailed trip reports from newbies recently, and I want to share my thoughts and feelings as well. Based on what I had read prior to the trip, some of my comments might be controversial, but they are just my personal opinions.

My wife and I are, or should I say “were”, very vanilla going into this trip. We had never been to ANYthing “clothing optional” and had certainly never played with others before. It was all my idea, and my wife is a good sport, so although nervous, she agreed to go. I had done all the research and reading of forums and she did not, so she relied on my comments and what I had learned.

We’re both young-ish, she at 34 and me at 40, but the club/party scene is NOT our thing, so I chose Pearl over RM for the more chill atmosphere. (Our idea of a great time is drinking wine while listening to jazz, and playing card games and laughing with friends. Screaming to talk over the sound of blaring techo thumping while getting wasted sounds more like torture to us. But to each their own.)

Before leaving, I had deliberately cleared my mind of any expectations or agendas, so neither one of us would feel pressure of any kind. I think this is absolute KEY for any nervous newbies. I had insisted we move at her pace, and told her that whatever makes her comfortable is fine by me. After all, we were there for “us” and not anybody else. Going there with no agenda, but keeping ourselves open to new experiences was our agreed upon goal.

We flew into Cancun on a Tuesday and booked USA transfers for transportation. The instructions on exiting the airport in their email were slightly incorrect, and so after a minute or two of confusion we found our way to their staff. They were polite, funny, and quickly had us on our way to Pearl. (Note: Per their instructions, there are not “two” separate exits labeled differently. Either exit door is labeled the same and will take you to the same place.)

About 20 minutes later, we arrived at Pearl and the intoxicating smell emanating from the lobby greeted us along with some very friendly front desk folks. They checked us in and gave us sparkling wine, cool towels, and yellow bracelets identifying us as “first-timers”. Now, some people don’t like these, but I thought it was a great idea, and it REALLY helped us identify other newbies. A great conversation starter. They tried to sign us up for the “informational meeting” (i.e. sales pitch). I declined it, but that didn’t make a difference. More on that later.

They took us to room 86, a junior suite, which is in the Starfish villa on the quiet end of the pool. I had asked for that building specifically and I’m very glad they accommodated us. It was perfect. It was adjacent to the beach and very peaceful. We would definitely request it again, or at least that building. It is not the place to ask for if you want to be in the middle of the party. For us, it was ideal. The room was spacious and clean, with a nice balcony and a beautiful view of the ocean.

By the time we walked into our room it was already 7:30pm, so we showered, dressed up, and headed to the Pearl restaurant which requires no reservations. It was a French menu that night and the food was tasty. It was surreal watching people in very revealing dress come and go in the restaurant, and I’ll never forget the way my wife’s eyes bugged out when she first saw them. We had a lovely dinner and nice wine, and strolled back outside to the lobby. There was a band playing outside, “The Shokers” (sic), who were rocking 80s and 90s covers. They were fantastic! We sat on the outside sofas and soaked up the great music. People started to trickle out in their evening costumes. It was “911” night, which just meant, “wear whatever costume you want to wear” night. :) It was at this point my wife started to think, “What did I agree to?” There were some crazy costumes and the crowd skewed older, and she wondered out loud if she would be able to “hang” with this. (Turns out, she definitely could.)

We met Chris who was one of the Play Makers. The Play Makers are the staff who are quasi-hosts who chat up guests and coordinate games during the day-time. In the forums, there has been much said about these awesome folks, and many of them had worked at Desire for years. Recently, most of them have left and the Play Makers now are a brand spankin’ new crew. Literally, all of them had been working there for only a matter of days. (One girl was working her very first shift.) Anyway, Chris was very friendly and it made us feel good chatting with someone our own age. Everytime we saw him during the rest of our trip, he went out of his way to hang out with us. Great guy!

After the band wrapped up, they ushered us into the disco where we watched a short “Mr. Desire” contest, which was really nothing more than the random selection of a few of the more crazily dressed fellas and a clapping contest. We hung out a few minutes and then made our way to the infamous hot tub.

Ahhh… The hot tub. My wife and I both shed our clothes without hesitation and slipped in. It was hot seeing my wife do this without a single qualm. This is where we identified two other yellow-banded newbie couples our own age and chatted them up. One couple was a very chill, lifestyle couple from our area and the other was a cool vanilla-but-curious couple. We quickly befriended these folks and all of us enjoyed several drinks and lots of great conversation. We called it a night and returned to our room for some well-deserved sleep.

The next day was my very favorite of the trip! We overslept for breakfast, but the staff at Aphrodite graciously made us some omelettes and toast. After eating, we grabbed some open chairs by the pool and my wife read while I chatted with our new friends in the water. We moved our conversation closer to her and she gave in and slipped into the pool without her top. Nice! At some point, they passed out pineapples with drinks inside them. We sipped on those while talking and laughing and we had a great time. One of the Play Makers came around with tequila squeeze bottles shooting liquor on breasts while the guys licked it off. Knowing my wife, I knew this was a hard “no” and was not something she was comfortable with, so I stepped in front of her to suggest “no thanks”. The Play Maker shot it on a new girl standing next to me and the girl grabbed me to lick it off, I looked over at my wife who said “Go for it”, so I did. That was a first since I’ve been married. The PM then tried to shoot my wife, who said “Nope!” It was all good though and we wrapped things up to go take a nap before dinner.

After a short nap, we dressed all in white for “White Night” and went back to Pearl for dinner. We had dinner with the other vanilla couple and the four of us enjoyed some great Mediterranean food and drinks. After dinner, there was a different band who were also very talented, and we met back up with our new lifestyle friends! We watched the band and then moved into the disco where the was an acrobatic show. They were impressive and it was a great performance! The show ended and the DJ started spinning some awesome 90s tunes, and all six of us danced for a while. My wife, who HATES dancing, was having an absolute blast. The music turned more techno and we left.

The six of us eventually made our way to the hot tub and… ummm… we closed that bad boy down! We didn’t just pop our vanilla “cherry”, we absolutely nuked it. Yeah. Very, very hot. At the end of the night, we had to say a sad goodbye to our lifestyle friends who were leaving in the morning. We tried to squeeze in a couple of hours of sleep before we had to catch a transport for our Mayan excursion scheduled that morning.

Within 48 hours, I had already had my mind blown. One day started blending into another, so I won’t give a play-by-play for every single hour, but instead, I’ll list my thoughts, tips, and observations, especially for prospective newbies.

KUDOS
    The Desire Pearl staff are truly something special, and in my opinion, they make this place what it is. Everyone from gardeners to bartenders and from housekeepers to Play Makers were nothing short of fantastic. They REALLY love their jobs and they seem to genuinely care about the guests. I’ve never got so many hugs and handshakes from staff at a resort before. I cannot praise them enough, and words don’t accurately describe how pleasant they are and how eager they are to make you feel at home. These people are the reason we are SOOO coming back.

    Food was great, and there seemed to be something for everyone no matter what your dietary needs. If you don’t see something you like, just ask. They will bend over backwards to make you happy. Also, I recommend the beautiful flambe dessert in Unik. They dim the lights and put on a fireshow using Mayan liquor and a tasty array of desserts. You won’t be disappointed.
    I think our favorite restaurant was Pearl, FYI.

    The live pre-show bands were top-notch. Most nights we enjoyed them more than the actual “show”.

    I liked the yellow bands. Some people may not like being branded a newbie, but personally, I’d like them again when we go back. :)
NOT SO MUCH
    With everything, there is room for improvement. I hope management reads this forum and listens to suggestions Some things were not Desire’s fault, but they affected our stay so I want to point them out.

    They claimed to give each night at the disco it’s own decade genre of music (80s, 90s, 00s, Top 40), but it didn’t always work out that way. It mostly devolved to techno-ish and some nights it was WAAAAAY too loud. Granted, we don’t dig it anyway, but when you see people streaming out of the disco covering their ears ya might take a hint. Pick a genre of music and stick with it for the evening. Believe it or not, people still like to dance to music older than 3 years ago and they don’t need it to be at “space shuttle launch” volume.

    I don’t know if it was our specific room or what, but the shower would alternate between scalding hot and tepid water. This happened everytime we showered and it quickly ended frisky intentions when we were showering together. Also, the tiled bathroom floor can get really, really slick. A little texture in the shower area especially would go a long way for safety. In fact, there were several places around the hot tub and pool which would benefit from some grit or texture.

    I have no problem with the concept of a member program at Desire, but I don’t like that they “pressure” first timers. Despite me expressing no interest, they wanted to “just give me information” and I relented. I was very upfront that I was not going to invest, buy, or anything of the sort, but that didn’t stop the sales pitch. It was not a terrible experience, and I did receive discounts, but it was irritating especially after being very clear not being interested. I think the target audience should be the folks who consistently come to Desire, but aren’t club members. “No” should mean “no” after all, right?

    Almost every guest we met at DP was cool, and we made some really great new friends who we will be in touch with for a long time. There was one LS couple we met in the pool who was rather aggressive and focused heavily on us and two other couples. They didn’t know us and we told them we were vanilla (not true, but they didn’t know that), and yet there was some uninvited and inappropriate physical contact. We all distanced ourselves from them, but it really ruined that day for my wife and she was still upset about it the next morning. It turns out they weren’t even guests there, but rather, they were visiting from RM. That couple, along with constantly hearing from other people about how RM was much more a party atmosphere, confirmed my reasoning that DP was much better suited to our laid back style. This wasn’t Pearl’s fault by any means, but it leads me to my next statement…

    There are all types of folks there, some quiet, some loud, some chill, some spun-up, but it seems to me that there were multiple older men who somehow couldn’t get past the fact that, well, they were surrounded by boobs. They would make some rather crude, rude comments now and then to anyone close by. The younger guests (later in the week the age skewed much younger) played it much, much more cool. My advice to anyone NOT wearing a yellow bracelet is to remember that maybe, just maybe, a complete stranger doesn’t want hear about you fingering your wife on the dance floor, or that just because we’re all at a nude lifestyle-friendly resort all the ladies must want to play with you. This was just a handful of people, and by no means ruined our trip, but we could have definitely done without. Just play it cool.
TIPS
    Choose your room carefully. Cokemann has a great map in the forum, choose a room or building that will best suit your style, whether it be close to the action or further away.

    Do the couples massage class with Richard and Lauren. We didn’t do it and regret it. People raved about it.

    Pack the amount of sunscreen you think you need, then double it. Also, bring any medicine you can think of. I’m in medical, and I’m so glad I brought everything I could fathom we might need. I helped a lot of people out. Consider nausea, diarrhea, itchy bug bites, hangovers, pain, sunburn, etc. Better to be safe than sorry.

    Bring lots of tip money. Trust me, you will WANT to tip these folks.

    Bring those Yeti cups or the equivalent. They’ll keep your frozen drinks (Pina Coladas) or beer cold so much longer!

    Dress up according to your style. Don’t worry, the style spanned conservative to crazy. Go with whatever you want. You’ll fit in no matter what you wear. I think new people stress too much about this.

    Bring something fun to pass out on Neon night. We brought a box of light-up rings to pass out and they were a hit.

    Some people will disagree with me on this, but here it is: Do something else other than Desire sometimes. Many people on here say don’t do it, but for us, doing something else now and then, was vital to our fun. Don’t get me wrong, Desire is a blast and, yes, you are spending a lot of money, but we loved taking a break and coming back to it. To do Desire all day, every day for a week would have been too much. This is what we did-
    Day 1 (PM) - Desire
    Day 2 - Desire
    Day 3 - (AM) Mayan Excursion (PM) Desire
    Day 4 - Desire
    Day 5 - (AM) Toured Puerto Morales and the beach (PM) Desire
    Day 6 - (AM) Snorkeling the reef (PM) Desire
    Day 7 - Desire

    Like I said, this might not be for everyone, but it was vital for us. And when we go back, we’ll most likely do it like this again.
Okay, well I’ve typed a book now so I’ll stop here. It’s true, you make your time at Pearl what you want it to be. Don’t be afraid to mingle. We’re definitely going back, it’s just a matter of “when”. I’ve been back home less than 24 hours so if you have any questions hit me up while it’s fresh in my mind.

Thanks!
SingleMalt77
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Re: First Timers- Vanilla no more FEB 2018

Postby sweatstorm » Wed Feb 28, 2018 8:22 pm

Good report. Thanks for the info for our upcoming newbie visit.
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Re: First Timers-Vanilla no more, Feb. 2018

Postby yoyo » Thu Mar 01, 2018 2:19 pm

We could never leave desire for a Tour or Excursion in a 4-6 day stay .... too much naked fun there.
:D
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Re: First Timers-Vanilla no more, Feb. 2018

Postby Desire2424 » Thu Mar 01, 2018 3:06 pm

Great report. The best thing about any vacation is doing exactly what you want to do and maybe discovering new adventures. Sounds like you did just that! We’re not swapping lifestylers but after our first trip to Desire, we’re hotter for each other every day and more curious than ever about how much fun we will have on our upcoming second trip in 2 weeks. I don’t know if we’ll “nuke our cherry” like you guys but the endless possibilities are exciting to imagine. There’s nothing else like Desire. Thank for sharing.
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Re: First Timers-Vanilla no more, Feb. 2018

Postby TandD » Thu Mar 01, 2018 6:33 pm

Great report. Glad you enjoyed your trip and thanks for valuable info for those thinking of going.

As for the membership hard sell - eh, you told them you weren't interested but agreed to listen to what they were selling. That's a mixed message in the world of selling and there's no way they are going to just let you walk. :D

We just tell them we aren't interested at all and have never been pressed further.
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Re: First Timers-Vanilla no more, Feb. 2018

Postby SouthCarolinaCpl » Fri Mar 02, 2018 8:43 am

If you need an excursion, we love walking down the beach to Puerto Morales and grabbing a quick lunch there. Some of the local restaurants are top notch!
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Re: First Timers-Vanilla no more, Feb. 2018

Postby Explorer79 » Fri Mar 02, 2018 10:04 am

I wonder what their response would be if you looked them in the eye and said "I thought the rule at Desire is No means No"
\m/
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Re: First Timers-Vanilla no more, Feb. 2018

Postby 22truckie » Fri Mar 23, 2018 9:28 am

Awsome trip report. We did our first trip a couple of years ago and pretty much had the same results. The place is awsome. We didn't (thankfully) run into the "aggressive, boasting, I did this to my wife on the dance floor, boobs, boobs, boobs talk". We were never pressured by lifestyle people but talked to some lifestyle couples about it. They were completely cool and open. We did have a very nice good looking couple nicely proposition us which we looked at as a huge compliment but was something we were not ready for. We declined with no issues ( and now wished we could go back in time :)
One suggestion for when you go back, and you will, do the photo shoot!!!! We did and have to say it it will never be topped. The most amazing, sensual experience I will ever have with my wife. They make you feel so relaxed that you forget they are there and you get lost in the moment. It's all in the timing. We had a major storm come in and did the second part out on the pier in the rain!! ( first for the photographer) The shots were EPIC, we bought a book of the shoot and a photo of us on the pier intertwined is blown up above our bed in black and white. We remember that day every night :) :). Our avatar photo is one of the shots. Going back in November for the 3rd time. Glad you had a great time and you were spot on, about following your wifes lead as I said in my newbie report. The women run DP. The smart man follows their lead. Congrats and
start planning the next trip!
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Re: First Timers-Vanilla no more, Feb. 2018

Postby sunseekercpl1 » Tue Mar 27, 2018 2:33 pm

Great trip report! We've been to Pearl 5 times and RM 4 time. Almost everything you mentioned in your report I would agree with. Sorry to hear you had one bad run-in with an obnoxious older guest. Of all the times we've been to Desire, we've only run into one other guest who "rubbed" us the wrong way with his comments and somewhat aggressive nature, and yes he was an older guy too (late 50's, early 60's) who thought he owned the place. However, of all the times we've been to both resorts, he was the only jackass we've run into. Over the years we have met a ton of genuinely nice people who are fun to be around. We've made a number of lasting friendships over the years, some of whom we will be seeing again during our next trip to DP this November.
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