A Desire stay for a non-lifestyle couple?

[tempanon]

Hello all -

I've looked through the forum and read through some very helpful posts. Thanks to everyone who moderates and contributes here - it's very helpful for someone trying to get a sense of the place!

My wife and I are considering spending a couple days at Desire as part of a longer trip. What we're looking for is someplace to relax for a couple days, that has a low-key clothing-optional pool/beach, and ideally has good snorkeling from shore. I've read a few very helpful posts that address all of those but had a few additional questions:

- How good is the snorkeling from shore? Is it feasible to kayak out to snorkel at the off-shore reef? (we could always take a tour, but we like the freedom of being under our own steam)

- This would be trying out the clothing optional thing for my wife. That said, if she ends up keeping her suit on the whole time is she likely to feel out of place?

- What is the rough breakdown of lifestyle/non-lifestyle guests on a non-takeover week? We're not in the lifestyle - and to quote Seinfeld, "Not that there's anything wrong with that!" However, I'm curious if people feel like others are intruding when they come and don't play - or if those who don't play feel like they are intruding?

Sorry for all the newbie questions! I came up with Desire when I did a quick look for someplace to stay in the area based on our criteria above. That said, I figured I'd ask in case I was off-base. (Along the same lines, if I am off-base, any recommendations people might have would also be very much appreciated.)

Thanks!

[CokeMann]

- How good is the snorkeling from shore? Is it feasable to kayak out to snorkel at the off-shore reef? (we could always take a tour, but we like the freedom of being under our own steam)

The first thing to realize is that the reef which extends from just south of Cancun all the way to Cozumel is now a protected marine park. To snorkel anywhere on the reef you will have to purchase a permit (approx $2 pp per day). There are only a few authorized reef mooring spots near to Desire and these are owned by the nearby Snorkel Tour operators so they won't take kindly to to you trying to use them for a kayak - lol

If you want a decent reef snorkeling experience I would suggest booking with a private operator out of nearby Puerto Morelos rather than the cattle car mass snorkeling tour operators - PM me and I'll send you some suggestions

- This would be trying out the clothing optional thing for my wife. That said, if she ends up keeping her suit on the whole time is she likely to feel out of place?

Desire is clothing optional not "nude required" - no one will really notice or care what she is wearing on not wearing - but my guess is that very shortly after she arrives she will quickly adapt to the level of dress/undress that she is comfortable with.

- What is the rough breakdown of lifestyle/non-lifestyle guests on a non-takeover week? We're not in the lifestyle - and to quote Seinfeld, "Not that there's anything wrong with that!" However, I'm curious if people feel like others are intruding when they come and don't play - or if those who don't play feel like they are intruding?

It of course depends on the week and who is there that week - the average, I would say, is about 30% full lifestyle, 30% adventuresome couples(swayers) with the balance just there to enjoy the freedom and sensuality of the place. Most that are in the lifestyle are not judgmental and accepting of those that are not.

[mfay]

Tempanon- I'd agree with everything coke said. Give it a try- chances are you'll be very comfortable.

Coke- don't recall ever hearing that term "swayers" before but I love it ! From now on when I'm answering these type questions I am going to use that instead of soft swing and all those other tired terms.
Swayers is perfect !

[CLG]

My wife and I have been to Desire Cancun a few times and no one cares what you wear. I have had skin cancer, so I wear a large hat and sun protective clothing around the pool all day long. There is no there that has more clothes on than I do & no one has given me a hard time, although many people do ask but in a friendly way.

As for the lifestyle, my wife and I are not involved, again never an issue, never a comment. We have been asked numerous times about participating, a simple no is all it takes.

We were just there a week ago and going back in October, it is a wonderful place.

[le1952]

My wife and I visited Desire last fall. We are not swingers but had been to clothing optional resorts. We liked the freedom to relate to each other without someone coming up to us and saying that we can't kiss in the pool or hug in the jacuzzi.
We were approached, politely declined and were received politely. Nothing we saw (frankly just about everything) offended us as we feel others should be free to express themselves if they wish. If that offends you then you should stay away.
I would enjoy myself and perhaps make some friends.
There may be more of us non Lifestylers than you think.

[tempanon]

Thanks - this is very helpful!

[miranda]

There may be more of us non Lifestylers than you think.

Our thoughts exactly.

[mande]

Re: Kayaking to the reef to snorkel

We have done this twice and both times the coast patrol caught us. Both times we played dumb, luckily had our reef wristbands on, so they told us to go back to the resort. So we did.

Having said that, I wouldn't trade the kayak snorkel experience for anything. Desire is aware of the no kayak to the reef thing so don't exactly tell them or they will not want you to do it. Our opinion - go for it!!!

Re: "lifestyle". What we love most about Desire is you are always accepted for who you are by the other guests no matter what your age, size, level of comfort is. Yes, the odd couple, few and far between, are overt in their conquest to find the next couple to play with. But at the end of the week they always seem to be alone in the pool with no real friends to talk to.

Mark and Elena - 20th week at Desire coming up in September!

[funcpl2741054]

if you are not into swinging, in our opininion, you should go somewhere else.

[vablondie]

We have been to Desire 8 times now so please believe me when I say that the above attitude is rare. Most people that go to Desire have a live and let live attitude. As long as you are considerate to others no one really gives a shit what you do or are into.
You can be stark naked the whole time or wear a regular suit no one cares. It is the kind of environment though that she should be entirely comfortable being naked. The staff doesn't bat an eye as they've seen it all.
As far as lifestyle or not in my opinion it doesn't really matter. Rarely are there those that are solely looking to score. Most people are just there on vacation with their SO enjoying each other and if other opportunities come along cool, if not they party make some friends and have a great time.
My advice is to just be open, honest and upfront with people from the get go about where you are in lifestyle (as in not in it) and you will have a great time.

[miranda]

What Desire advertises itself to be is "Lifestyle Friendly", not a total Lifestyle Resort.

As has been posted here, it doesn't take long for folks to find out "what brings you to Desire" and, if you are not what they are looking for, they move on to find folks who are - no harm, no foul.

As also mentioned here, it's a resort that appeals to many different vacationers. Adult Couples Only. Lifestyle Friendly. Clothing Optional.

Go and enjoy!

[wetcoastcouple]

if you are not into swinging, in our opinion, you should go somewhere else.

Wow . . . just wow. .

Maybe they should make you the Marketing Director . . . the place would close within a month.

As mentioned many many times in various posts, swingers usually only make up 30-40% of the clientele at any given time. Think the place could stay open with those numbers on a year round basis ? How fun would it be to be hanging out with only 40 couples of all varying ages in an empty Resort ?

The simple fact is there obviously isn't enough swingers that want to frequent the place to keep it open on a full time basis so they NEED to make it open to everyone.

So maybe do us all a favor and try not to scare the newbies away with your singularly focused opinion, because I for one would MUCH MUCH rather have a FULL Resort with couples on all levels of the lifestyle to have fun with on my vacation.

[DandJ4X]

Soon to be there (not soon enough though ) for our 4th trip.
We are non-lifestyle oriented as we choose to only enjoy each other. However we also love to have a great time
No other place in the world that you can experience the atmosphere that Desire offers to all walks of life.

Some comments as the one above simply don't deserve attention
Go and enjoy; Our guess is you'll be back

[wflake]

Amen WetCoastCouple.....

My wife and I are regular 2 twice year visitors to Desire, yet I haven't been intimate with another woman since the day I laid my eyes on the love of my life...thats what works for us.

That said, we LOVE to the sensuality of Desire, watching and being watched in the most sexually intense climate we've ever experienced (not talking about the weather). Yes we are that couple over in the hot tub beds that is "busy" all the time ':D'

Every time we are there our physical (and emotional) intimatcy for each other is incredible and it carries over when we get home.

We are usually approached several times by other couples, we merely smile and state that we are "exclusive", this usually leads to getting to know a new couple with no judgement either way.

Desire is one of the most open, erotic, sensual, fun and non-judgemental places in the world.

GO and enjoy....

[wflake]

Amen WetCoastCouple.....

My wife and I are regular 2 twice year visitors to Desire, yet I haven't been intimate with another woman since the day I laid my eyes on the love of my life...thats what works for us.

That said, we LOVE to the sensuality of Desire, watching and being watched in the most sexually intense climate we've ever experienced (not talking about the weather). Yes we are that couple over in the hot tub beds that is "busy" all the time ':D'

Every time we are there our physical (and emotional) intimatcy for each other is incredible and it carries over when we get home.

We are usually approached several times by other couples, we merely smile and state that we are "exclusive", this usually leads to getting to know a new couple with no judgement either way.

Desire is one of the most open, erotic, sensual, fun and non-judgemental places in the world.

GO and enjoy....